Team Abundant Joy arrived safely in Jinotepe, Nicaragua about 1 week ago. We have been working with Pastor Cairo and his wife Leli at their Baptist church. This month we’re tenting but are blessed with the use of the church’s classroom for our tents so some have even put up their hammocks. With it being month 8, we are all loving having our own mini-bedrooms. As a missionary for the past 7 months, I have gotten used to serving and helping in a variety of ways. Already, in the last week, we scrubbed down the inside and outside of the church, painted, uprooted and replanted banana trees, washed windows, moved a mound of dirt into sacks, handed out tracts, took a teammate to the doctor, went door to door inviting kids to Sunday School, and attended 5 church services. Sounds pretty good right? And yet, I have never felt so helpless.
What the people of Nicaragua really need isn’t something I or my team can provide. What they really need is rain. Rain for their crops that aren’t growing which is driving up the prices of food like beans and corn. When you used to be able to buy beans for 10 cordovas, now that same amount costs 25 cordobas and the price is supposed to rise again to over 30 or 35. Rain for their pastures to feed the animals that are either extremely skinny or have already died from lack of food. Pastor Cairo says the church has had numerous prayer vigils and still the rain doesn’t come. He said that Nicaragua has had bad years of little rain in the past but that this year is the worst. People are either moving out of Jinotepe or out of Nicaragua entirely.
It’s an interesting spot to be, as a missionary, to stand by and not really be able to help. To know that the only trees in town getting any water are the banana trees we replanted in the yard and manually poured buckets of water on. To see the look of utter delight on people’s faces when it does start to rain and then the look of despair when it stops soon after. I expected to see more poverty in these last 4 countries but as someone who thrives on fixing problems, I didn’t expect to feel so helpless. It’s easy to say that I will trust God in the hard times but the people of Nicaragua are living it. Why hasn’t God answered their prayers for rain? Where is God’s goodness when the poor man literally can’t afford the poor man’s food? It felt empty to say “Dios le bendiga” which means “God bless you” as we handed out tracts promising an eternity in heaven when some people’s daily needs aren’t even being met.
In a world that continues to make less sense, the promise that God is good and never changes is one I’m clinging to. In Matthew 6:25-26, Jesus says, “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?” He knows the exact number of hairs on each of our heads. His plan is perfect. He promises good for those who trust in Him. Sometimes the answer comes in ways we don’t expect like ships from the Philippines that have come to Nicaragua, bringing beans. Other times we may have to wait like the Israelites who wondered the desert for 40 years before seeing the Promise Land, or we may not even see the answer in our lifetime.
There’s an old saying “When the going gets tough, the tough get going.” However, as pat as the answer may seem in times of trouble, God wants us to stay. To stay grounded in Him, to believe in Him, and cling to Him and His promises even when it may feel like we’re only holding on by our pinkie finger. Our circumstances are probably still the same but with our focus on Jesus instead, we’ll be able to see His hand outstretched, reaching to save us from sinking. With Him, Peter walked on water, the sick were healed, the blind could see, the dead were raised. We’re never promised that it’ll be easy or all make sense. Do we truly trust or is our faith conditional?
