Lately, I’ve had quite a few feelings about life. I am just a few short weeks away from graduating from an amazing university where I’ve found unmatched community, and in just a few months I will be embarking on a journey unlike anything I’ve ever experienced. The relationships I’ve formed here have been beyond influential, and not a day goes by that I am not so thankful.
But do you also just have those days where you feel lonely? Where the relationships you are in feel off? Where even you just feel off in general? This could last for a day or weeks at a time. There is no shame in that. I have certainly experienced it, and it’s something that’s been weighing on my mind lately. I’m such a people-oriented being, but there are certainly days where I do not feel loved and wanted. And I’m starting to figure out what to do when thoughts like this creep in-
“Instead of waiting for community, provide it, and you’ll end up with it anyway.” – Jen Hatmaker
THIS QUOTE. Jen hit the nail on the head with this one in her book For the Love (as she did with basically everything she wrote in that book). I have most certainly found that when I’m feeling down or lonely, guess what? I reach out to a friend, and there ya go, the community is restored. It’s not always easy. My feelings don’t always cooperate, but from a simple offer to get coffee and reminding that person or people that THEY are loved and wanted ends up gifting me with the same reminder.
One of the best surprises is when someone does that for me, so I started writing this blog with this one thing in mind-
Ladies, let’s cheer each other on in all aspects of life.
Too often, we are told to compete against each other. To compare ourselves to each other. To put each other down to make ourselves look better. To judge each other. To be too busy for each other.
But I come to you today with a simple encouragement- we are made for so much more than that. We are capable of great, life-changing, tear-worthy, beautiful things. There are so many times when we get down on ourselves and each other when a simple encouragement can turn everything around. We have been told to walk on egg shells. We have been told to quiet our voice. Instead, let’s bring out the best in each other. Let’s encourage each other to dream big dreams. Let’s encourage each other to live a messy life, for it’s in those messes that we somehow, paradoxically, find the most beauty.
I believe that every woman should have the opportunity to do what she loves, and I pray that society will come to the point where these opportunities are given and that we will all come to the point where we can fully support each other in that. To the student- I support you. To the stay-at-home mom- I support you. To the CEO- I support you. To the unemployed- I support you. To the pastor- I support you. To the woman struggling- I support you. I think the last one probably applies to more of us than we realize, and because of that, let’s intentionally support one another.
When I take the time to stop focusing on myself and worrying about my own insecurities and fears, I look around me and see women that have unbelievable gifts, talents, and goals. I should take the time to do it more often, and when I do, I should tell them about how awesome I think they are. This practice is one that I find to be holy.
In Jesus Feminist, Sarah Bessey gives the beautiful advice to, “Rest in your God-breathed worth. Stop holding your breath, hiding your gifts, ducking your head, dulling your roar, distracting your soul, stilling your hands, quieting your voice, and satiating your hunger with the lesser things of this world.”
Let’s say this to each other! May we combat the world when it tells us to be quiet and afraid and judgmental and instead replace it with these words. Sometimes, we all have trouble convincing ourselves to believe and practice these things, so when you know of a friend that doesn’t believe it, tell her otherwise.
To those who are reading this, you are so loved. You are so gifted. You are so worthy. I want to shout it from the rooftops. These authors like Jen Hatmaker, Sarah Bessey, Rachel Held Evans, and Brené Brown have inspired me with new ways of thinking and a wealth of wisdom. And the women that I get to know personally- my mom, my aunts, my granny, my JoJo, my cousins, my mentors, my friends- oh, how they have changed my life and indescribably inspire me. God uses them to encourage me when they don’t even know I need encouraging.
These words are ones that I’ve wanted to write for quite some time, and they’ve been even more at the forefront of my mind as I prepare for the World Race. The community I have now is one I cherish so much and know the adjustment to traveling will be a hard one. I am nervous about the community that I will soon form with many other women for eleven months, but hasn’t God proved himself over and over again? C.S. Lewis said, “we meet no ordinary people in our lives,” and I am convinced that this will once again ring true for the Race. These people will have gifts and dreams that I will wholeheartedly admire, be inspired from, and get to cheer them on toward good works for the Kingdom once again.
So, to the women I haven’t met yet- I can’t wait to meet you and learn of your beautiful essence. And to the women who have impacted me in ways I cannot even describe- thank you, and I am constantly in awe of the talent and strength and beauty that surrounds me on a daily basis.
I’ll leave you with another quote from For the Love, reminding you of God’s great calling for you, whatever it may be, and that I so speak these words over you with enthusiasm-
“God is unveiling women around the world. He always has and continues to work through women and girls, who are half of His church. They are, like men and boys, His image bearers. They are also, like men and boys, gifted, empowered, smart, and anointed.”
