Ambition. 3 years of your life + $120,000 of educational tuition = lucrative career as a lawyer. With a doctorate, I have financial stability and my future is secure. Right??
My whole life, I have been doing what I am supposed to do. Study hard. Practice your jump shot. Have a good social circle. Find a nice girlfriend. Be a good Christian… Until just recently, I treated my relationship with God as just one part of my to do list. Sure I wore my “Christian hat” and devoted a big chunk of my week to Bible studies, helping with youth ministry, and even some daily devotionals, but my spiritual growth was merely another course in my schedule. Contract offer and acceptance–check. Closing argument for Harper case–check. Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it–uh…check??
This past summer epitomizes how skewed my priorities had become. Few people realize that before taking the California Bar Exam, most law school graduates drop off the face of the earth for two months. They quit their jobs, put a hold on unnecessary relationships, and lock themselves away in libraries for 10+ hours a day. This was my life this past summer. Not only did I fork out a few thousand bucks to take a bar review course, I put a pause on all ministry activities and only spent time with friends and family when it fit into my schedule. Seems pretty drastic right? Yet somehow, I had no problems quitting all my commitments so I could focus on passing some silly legal test. Despite my efforts to ignore it, one question lingered in my mind–how was I doing on the test that actually mattered?
How is it that I can profess Christ to be my personal savior, to believe that ultimately my life here on earth is ephemeral, yet only be willing to commit myself fully to earthly causes like grad school? What if I was willing to drop off the face of the earth for a few months for the sake of my soul? What if I stopped worrying about establishing careers, repaying student loans, and building the perfect family? What if I cast all my inhibitions aside and devoted the next 11 months of my life to building my relationship with my creator and committing myself to loving his people.
Here goes nothing…
