Well, this is happening.
I never expected that at this point in my life I would be headed around the world for 9 months. But God is good, and His plan is much better than my own. I have so much to look forward to, but looking back I can also see how much God has worked in my life in the past to bring me here. So let’s get into it.
On a cold day back in 2000, a small Brendan came into existence. Growing up, I was fortunate that my parents raised me in faith. We always had church on the weekends and I went to a Christian school, so I had a solid foundation right from the start. Through elementary school, I did really well in school and quickly developed a joy for soccer, skateboarding, and skiing. For being a youngun’, I had a solid faith. My dad tells me that when I was young I enjoyed the mountains because I felt closer to God, and in 5th grade, I preached in front of my entire elementary school about the importance of Scripture. Going into middle school, I began playing competitive soccer, and it took over a large part of my life. By the end of 6th grade, my classes had become boring and unchallenging, so my principal allowed me to skip straight into 8th. I led worship at chapel for my school that whole year, and really grew in what I knew of faith. I loved my classes, had plenty of friends, and life was good, seemingly.
Then, all at once, life took a turn. I was cut from my soccer team, which wrecked me. I sobbed for weeks, and I walked straight away from the sport. Then, on my 8th grade field trip to Washington DC, my newfound ‘friends’ from my new grade told me that I was a nerd, that no one would take me seriously and that I would never be popular. On top of that, I began to see what it was like to struggle with sin for the first time. For the first time, I felt true brokenness, and my trust in God was weakened. After enduring one more year of struggle at my school, I left to focus on engineering-centered classes at the public school near my house.
And bam, I became a small fish in a big pond. Now, I did not stand out. I was thrown into a place with thousands of kids, lots of which were more talented than me, smarter than me, and worked harder than me. I had to start fresh, and insecurity took hold of me. I struggled to find good friends, and for the first time school was really hard. I had lost all the things that I had put my identity in, and had no idea what it meant to make Christ my identity. Through this time, I acknowledged Jesus as my Savior, but looking back, nothing more. My faith stagnated, and my relationship with Jesus consisted only of church on Sundays and the occasional youth group meeting.
Yet gradually, Jesus began to reveal himself again. Over the summer after my sophomore year, I was able to go to Jamaica on a weeklong mission trip with my youth group. There God showed me a little bit of what it really meant to follow Jesus, and it changed my outlook on life. Going back home, I joined the mountain bike team, began to get internships with engineering, and pursued better relationships. I began spending more time with this motocross rider named Christian, and we hit it off. We had become friends through our mutual interest in motorcycles, and we started mountain biking together. After a while, I casually invited him to church. At the time, he had no idea who Jesus was, but knew that the teaching was unlike any other. He came to Christ and we soon started to pursue faith together. In attempting to answer his questions and lead him in the right direction, my relationship with Christ was challenged, and I began to grow again. Iron sharpens iron, so Christian sharpened me. Senior year finished out with a bang, and I did well in classes, racing, and got an awesome summer internship with a civil engineering firm.
I looked into doing a gap year right after that, and was referred to the world race. After a little research, I found that I was not yet old enough to go, so I gave it up. I figured at that point the opportunity had passed and I had to focus on engineering. So I enrolled at CSU with Christian, and landed my dream internship learning how to fabricate bike frames.
Little did I know, college was the place Jesus would take ahold of me altogether. Going into school, all I knew was that I wanted to get involved in a group. After trying a few out, we found out that the guys on both sides of our dorm room were devout followers of Christ, and they went to the Navigators. Christian and I began hanging out with them, and became more and more involved in the group until we were fully invested. From that point, my life changed. My pursuit of Jesus changed from being simply an afterthought, and I stopped using grace as an excuse to sin. I pursued knowledge in scripture and began to actually pray in authenticity. The community that God built for me started holding me accountable and helped me find out what it truly meant to follow Jesus, and that He is truly above all. I was brought to my knees, humbled, and convicted over my time, but the Lord gave me peace and broke chains.
Then, my friend Aidan approached me with an idea. He told me that God had put it on his heart to start a prayer meeting, to start gathering as a group of believers to labor in prayer over the lost, to petition for revival on campus. I was hesitant at first, but figured that Scripture says prayer is powerful, and the Lord is there when two or more are gathered in His name. So I decided to join, and then I truly began experiencing the Lord like never before. We would meet Sunday nights, coming together to worship and pray together on our knees, and it made a difference. I started feeling the Spirit rest upon me, and I would be overcome with chills. God took away my discomfort and showed me how to let go of my pride, and to leave everything before Him in prayer. We prayed together to surrender all of ourselves to the Lord and His will. We prayed that God could break our hearts for what breaks His.
As time went on, we began to see the power of God manifest itself. We started seeing healing happen, and my friends began having visions of angelic beings. We started seeing the lost saved, and the Lord began providing opportunities for us to step out in faith.
One night, Christian and I decided to put on a sermon from our church back home. The talk was on trust, and it was aimed at finances. It centered on the need for us to trust God by tithing, calling us to believe that Jesus truly will take care of our needs and use our finances to bring His Kingdom. Initially, I was convicted because I had stopped tithing in order to save for school, and I realized that I had been making excuses. I had been spending money on biking and skiing and did not give, using school as my justification. And right after, I was wrecked convicted about the Race. God tore into me, asking me why I was so concerned with my life back here. He asked me why I could not trust Him with jobs and scholarships here. He was calling to follow Him for a period.
Initially, I had none of it. There was no way I was gonna leave my life here, leave my friends and put my classes and work on hold. “No!” I screamed. But the more I wrestled, the more I realized that this is what I had to do. I had to trust, to believe that the Lord is faithful, and holds me in His hands. It suddenly became very simple: Matthew 28, the Great Commission. Jesus said that by his authority we are to go to make disciples of all nations. From that point on, I knew that that was exactly what I had to do.
So here I stand. I am going on the Race. I am taking 9 months to devote all of myself to God and relationship, to prayer and meditation on the Word, to service and self-sacrifice, to surrender and discomfort, to trial and struggle, to evangelism and teaching, to labor and worship, to adventure and love. I am going not just so that I can bring God’s children to His Kingdom, but also to bring His Kingdom to them. And I believe that in doing so next year, I will be better equipped to do that back home as well, in whatever I end up doing with my life.
Even after spending my whole life in Church, it took me until now to realize the simplicity of the Gospel. Jesus gave everything for us, humbled himself as a servant, as a man, and laid down his life so that he could pursue relationship with us. Despite our evil tendencies, he came looking for us. Even on the cross he said “Father, forgive them. For they know not what they do.” How can I not do the same? How can I not trust him with more than just my Sunday morning? The Lord did not make us for us, he made us for him, and he wants all of us.
So I encourage you, surrender to the Lord. Go all in. His love is overwhelming, and he brings more life to this world than any other pursuit. Give in to that love, and I promise, you will experience true joy, life, and renewal.
“And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them. This is how love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment: In this world we are like Jesus.” – 1 John 4:16-17
I am so excited for the opportunity the Lord has given me. Thank you so much for your prayer and support, I can’t do this without that. God is good.
In love,
Brendan
