During our time in Ecuador my team had the chance to visit the coast, which was hit with an earthquake last year. To read more about the ministry we did while there, check out my last blog post.
During our first evening in La Chorrera we took some of the kids we made friends with to the beach. As we approached the beach I saw the waves and immediately thought about just staying on the beach. The waves weren’t huge, but they were cresting close to the shore. This is a fear I don’t have to face much due to the fact that the closest ocean is at least a whole day’s drive away from where I live in the United States.
When everyone was getting in, I joined hesitantly. I would go out to where the water would hit my knees when the waves would come in, but I found myself anxious to go any deeper. The sand would slide from underneath my feet, and I could feel the power of the next wave rolling to shore. I convinced myself that my anxiety was just respect for the ocean – God’s creation filled with giant animals that have sharp teeth and mighty waves that show no mercy to anything that stands in its way.
As I stood there with my fear, I watched my teammates head out into the water, children in toe, without a second thought. I realized that there was something holding me back that wasn’t holding anyone else back. I went out deeper, but still where my feet could touch the ocean floor. I continued to watch my teammates go out deeper, and they weren’t scared. They were laughing and having fun. I was kind of enjoying myself, but it wasn’t much fun because my heart was full of fear.
I saw my lovely teammate, Natalie, floating out in the water – my comfort zone was being stretched by watching her. She was floating over every wave without fear of her lack of control. I would yell over to her, and each time was surprised by the joy and freedom in her voice. I watched the children hanging all over my other teammates, and heard the giggles after jumping over each wave. I joined them, but I could feel my heart pound each time a bigger wave came rushing towards us. I got taken out by a couple of waves, which gave my teammates a good laugh, then forced myself to go back out towards the rest of the group.
I wouldn’t go any further than where my feet could touch – it gave me a sense of control. I also tried to stay closest to shore. I figured that if a rip tide took us out to depths of the ocean, I would have the best chance of getting back to shore. Ridiculous, I know – but that is what was going through my head.
In this moment I realized that Jesus was teaching me about my relationship with Him. I realized that I was in the water, but I am still holding onto control and comfort. I realized that I was letting the waves of God’s love and mercy hit my knees, but I was stopping myself from going any deeper. I realized that in order to completely accept that sacrifice He made for us, that I have to also give up control and just hope that I float over each wave that comes.
I have sang, “take me deeper than my feet could ever wander” for years in church, but up until our time in La Chorrera I was never challenged to actually live that out. 
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Our time in Ecuador has quickly come to an end! We are beginning our 5 day trek to Thailand on Wednesday evening! Please be praying for safe travels!
