The three months that I lived in Costa Rica were the hardest three months of my life. The Lord taught me many things including patience, perseverance, trusting Him with my friend’s and family’s lives, and letting go of people I thought would be in my life forever. I am thankful for the trials the Lord has allowed me to go through because in the end it brought me closer to Him. I learned that when there was no one to go to, no one to talk to, and no one to listen, He was always there. The past few months, not only has God shown me how perfect of a father He is, but also that He is the ultimate best friend. Imagine having a best friend that you can tell anything to, will never turn their back on you, and will always have your best interest in mind. That is our heavenly father! How cool is that?? People will come and go but the Lord is constant. I’ve learned that if I’m going to open my heart to trust somebody, who better to trust than the Lord?
During those three months when trials arose, I cannot say I handled them perfectly. Its hard to be going through so much mentally and stay focused on the ministry at hand. Being completely honest there were multiple times I laid in bed crying telling God how bad I wanted to go home. I knew that if I went home from the race early, I would need to feel the Lord’s peace about it. I would get so frustrated because every time I “decided” I was going home I would not feel that peace. There was a small voice in my heart the whole time telling me that I wasn’t done, I can’t give up because things are hard, and the best is yet to come. So, to get me through those days God put two questions on my heart. The first was “where are you?” the question seems so simple, yet it has so much depth to it. Sometimes I need to be reminded how blessed I am to have to opportunity to travel the world. The second question was “why are you here?” Occasionally I could answer this question and remember why I came on the race. Other times I would cry out to the Lord and say “I don’t know!! Show me why I’m here!” Without fail, weather it was a big slap in the face or a little nudge, He would remind me.
The race is not always easy. I am in a new country and… woah I still have problems! Who would have thought crossing a border wouldn’t get rid of all my past hurt and issues? Crazy right? ??
Today I answer my two questions. First, where am I? Currently the Lord has put me in Quito, Ecuador. The most beautiful country I’ve ever seen is right under my feet. I have the chance to do and see things most people will never have the opportunity to experience. Who knew an entire country smaller than the state of Texas could have so many wonders to explore? From beaches to mountains and jungles to forests, Ecuador has it all and the opportunity to explore it is right at my fingertips. Second, why am I here? I am here because in March last year I took a leap of faith and applied for a mission trip that (little did I know) would change my life. I am here because I felt useless at home (I now know that was a lie). I wanted to do more and live my life completely for God. Trials and challenges have been thrown in my face since day one but I praise God for them. I would have never learned certain things about myself or bout the Lord if I hadn’t jumped out of my comfort zone to travel the world.
“God is not unjust; He will not forget your work and the love you have shown to Him as you have helped His people and continue to help them. We want each of you to show the same diligence to the very end, in order to make your hope sure. We do not want you to become lazy, but to imitate those who through faith and patience inherit what has been promised.” -Hebrews 6:10-12
As I continue my last two moths on the race I cling to these two questions. I’m so excited to see what God will teach me through them and how my relationship with Him will grow even more.
I realize I’ve been terrible at keeping up with blogging lately…! But stay tuned for what like has been like in Ecuador!
