Journal Entry back in Los Angeles
I’m new wine. I’m in new wineskins. All I
want to do is cry. All I want to do is just break. Break into pieces. I want to
know your love and perfect peace that surpasses understanding. I want to be so
soft towards your Spirit. So humble and willing to be the woman you’ve created
me to be. I’m broken. I’m grateful. I’m here because you have called me here.
I’m here because you want your people back. You loved me back, and I’m going to
love them back. I want Jesus…Give me Jesus!!! I don’t want my life to be complicated.
I want to be simply in love with you. I want to be so in tune with your Spirit
that nothing else is better than you. I need you Jesus!
“No
one sews a patch of unshrunk cloth on an old garment, for the patch will pull
away from the garment, making the tear worse. Neither do men pour new wine into
old wineskins. If they do, the skins will burst, the wine will run out and the
wineskins will be ruined. No, they pour new wine into new wineskins, and both
are preserved. ” Matthew 9:16-17
God spoke this over me last month as I prayed
into going home to L.A. This is the most comforting, confirming word for me to
step into life here again. I am new. He makes all things new. I have so much to look forward to in Him.
He also told me I’m a warrior with new armor
going into the old battlefield with my dry bones, and I’m speaking life to
those dry bones. I am no longer defeated. I am strong in Him. I get to bring
life, light, joy and Jesus wherever I go. The ground has been given to me as an
inheritance. I know who my Daddy is and He owns it all. I get to be a part of
His greater plan and that is to bring redemption to the hurting, and
restoration to the broken. Why can I bring that? He has freely given me
redemption to my hurting heart, and restoration to brokenness and broken
relationships. I’ve seen Him do it time and time again. His life changing power is my daily reminder that He’s crazy about me and my freedom!
This is over a year ago. I’m broken, craving real life, light, love and joy.
I get to be like Him in everyday life and I’m thankful all of
the time. He has been showing up daily and his mercy has followed me wherever I go.
The imagery of me a princess, and my Heavenly Father looking at me with love,
and saying He’s proud of me is exactly what He’s been waiting for. I’m that same
princess that is covered in the blood of Jesus, and walking into territory
that’s always been mine, I’m just claiming it and walking in authority. I have
new, strengthened armor after a year of fighting. He has put a new Spirit in
me, that won’t be put out or quenched. I’m going to the graveyard because that
is where the old me has died, and I was raised again to bring the Spirit of
life to the dead. I have to go the graveyard, the battlefield where all the
destruction happened and see the hope, life and purpose of Jesus. I don’t need
to go thick in the battle day in and day out. The battle has already been won
for my soul and I’ve chosen my first love. I have chosen freedom, life and joy.
The simple fact that I’m back here, is confirmation that He loves us. That He
loves you, me and He’s always coming back for us. He came back for me, not
moving forward in this pursuit of humanity without first capturing my heart, so
I can tell people about the capturer. He’s more than I need out there around
the world and He’s more than I need back here in the states. I pretty much have
decided that I can’t be without His presence. I absolutely crave it and have to
have it all the time. Without it I can’t see, hear or believe anything.
It is His will for me and for you. Right now, He’s speaking to you and saying you
were made for more. You were made for greatness that’s unlimited, and
unfathomable. That greatness is receiving His love without any strings attached. His love is too big for our minds, so that’s why He asks that we let Him change our hearts. He’s pursuing us in our brokenness, in our limited resources,
pain, questions and fears. He wants to replace all of that with your new
identity, new armor to walk into the graveyards and speak His life. That armor
is what is needed to walk as daughters and sons of Him who loved us first. He
chose us, and His biggest delight is when we choose Him. We choose Him because
we want to love Him back. I have experienced His love in such powerful ways and
all I want to do is give it out…
My identity as a Warrior Princess Speaking
Life to the Dead, and taking my Inheritance with Joy everyday! That is more
than enough for me, so I’ll give it away freely!!
Last week on the Race in Thailand being found by my first love!
