Rest. Trust. Wait.
I‘m on my stateside journey to
visit friends and family before I fly out to Spain on October 2nd. This time around I’m not surrounded by World Racers. It’s the Holy Spirit and me and we’re loving people everywhere we go. I’m breathing, reflecting and resting
while on different modes of transportation. It’s great how trains, busses,
planes and cabs can be such an opportunity to meditate and move forward
spiritually. But I can’t help but look back on the past three months and what
God has done in, through and around me. I am literally in awe of Him once
again. The 3 months I was back in the states after the World Race were beyond
amazing. I grew leaps and bounds and saw God’s heart for me in ways I’d never
experienced before. His hand of provision, pursuing love and passion for my
growth got me through victoriously. I am a new woman once again, not forgetting
the Lord’s blessings.
I have to put him on display,
because he truly has lavished His love on me in ways that just make me want to
cry and shout. First, I told you about how God provided me with a place to stay
with 2 amazing women of God. Well,
we became sisters and fell more in love with Jesus and each other this summer.
We served, prayed, loved, cried, broke bread, laughed, danced and pressed into
a deeper level of faith in the Lord. It was by far the best summer I’ve had in
L.A., and I attribute it to the community of women that God blessed me with.
Our little apartment had so much Spirit and friendship in it, that leaving was
not an easy task.
God’s will for me this summer was to rest. He taught me how
to cease striving, and seek His rest after a long season of work. He made it
very clear He wanted me to trust Him with the details of my life, big and small, so I
could just focus on being loved by Him and loving Him back. To my finite
mind, I didn’t see how that was enough. We would have conversations that would
usually have me asking Him, “shouldn’t I being do something, making this
happen, or show you I can do it?” He would always say, rest, trust and wait my
beloved, so I would. I had always just worked for something, networked and
pulled some strings to make a way for myself. I knew that God was doing a new
thing and teaching me total dependence by stripping me of all my securities. It was one of the hardest things I’ve had to do, but the benefits of trusting Him outweighed the difficulty.
I came home with a new identity
and He wanted to show me how to walk that out. I had heard of resting in the
Lord, read about it and wanted it but didn’t know how to rest. Well, I can say
that it’s a lot better to rest and let God have control than to strive and hold
onto my ways. He gave me a summer of deep friendship, deep faith and deep
experiences that I’ll never forget. I knew I had a transition of moving to
Spain coming, and saw God provide. I literally just trusted Him. I
learned how to hear His voice, and trust Him with my future and the people He
put in my life. I was intentional
with my time and the people I invested in while I was home, because I knew that
God had purpose in me being back in L.A. I saw so much fruit in that,
redemption in people’s lives and restoration of hearts that were far away from
Him. I got to be a part of His story in their lives, and for that I’m so
grateful. I honestly don’t know any other way to do life, but give it away. I
often felt like I didn’t have anything left to give after coming home. I
definitely didn’t have the job, apartment, car, money, and things that were
once so much a part of my life. I got over that and just walked in contentment
with the season God blessed me with. He showed me my place in the body. It
taught me to be totally dependent on Him for everything. I knew I had God’s
Spirit, time, talents and my heart that I loved to give generously.
Something He taught me this past
summer was to be willing to give it all away, and that I could trust Him to
provide. He began speaking to me about heaven and His desire for me to experience it here on earth more and more. His ways and ideas are not crazy, they are perfectly heavenly. I came to realize that my ideas and ways of doing things were actually crazy so when I started hearing from Him, I knew it was His voice. Well, that’s just what He did, He spoke about His provision and He provided. I came to L.A. and one of the first
weeks back, I met up with my L.A. Mom and Dad, and we chatted it up before I
left to see my family. They encouraged and prayed for me before dropping me off
at the airport and handed me a card. I opened it up after they left, and I had a legitimate freakout. I pretty much didn’t know what to say. Inside was a
$1000 check for ministry. Did I ask or say anything? No, God knew my needs and
I was able to take that added to 2 other gifts and put that towards my school
fees at G42. My mentor back in Michigan works for an organization that matches
grants and she was able to match the $1500 God provided which paid for $6000 I
needed for G42. Ridiculous!!!! I pretty much couldn’t get over how God worked
that out. So, I knew the task ahead was to continue to rest, trust and wait. So
I did just that and prayed into the $7000 I still need for flights and personal
expenses for the remaining 6 months of school. It was the middle of this month
and I hadn’t gotten my flight to Spain. I knew God would provide, but I didn’t
know how. I continued trusting even though it was hard. He didn’t release me to
ask anyone, and told me to let Him do it. So I did, and on Sept 21st
I had a coffee date with my L.A. Mom and Dad. We caught up on the past couple
months and they wished me well before my trip home. I went by their house and
saw the dopest set of suitcases, and said, “those suitcases are awesome.”
They looked at me and said, “go ahead, take them.” “What?” I was so thankful
because I needed new ones for my trip and was just going to go to the goodwill
and thrift it up. God cares and doesn’t miss a detail.
God’s not done yet, and this next
crucial part of the story I’m still processing. I get dropped off and Scott
begins to tell me that they love investing in me and really believe in what God
is doing in my life. He explains how they want to tithe to me and hope that I
can put the money to what I need. Of course I start crying and just thanking him
and God for what a miracle. Ahhhhhhh!!! Really? That money was put directly to
my flight to Spain that I was able to buy the next day, Sept 22nd,
the day before I left for Michigan to see my family. I couldn’t have had a more
peaceful sendoff. My little heart just got bigger and pretty much was about to
explode with gratitude. I’m just blown away by God’s way of doing things. It’s
so much better than mine and He truly loves me and wants to provide for me,
done and done. My dear sweet roommates prayed over me, helped me pack, made
midnight rides to the storage, let me borrow their car for errands, showered me
with the best gifts a sojourner could have and woke up at the dawn to take me
to the airport. I look at this summer and have to conclude that God wrapped me
up in a bun of love from the beginning to the end. I got to experience Him
delighting in me and me delighting in Him. I got to love BIG, and be loved BIG.
All the faith He put in me, pushed any ounce of doubt out. I’m not just walking
into my destiny and inheritance, I’m running and pioneering in this fight of
faith. I’m running with no burdens, resentments, fears, doubts or apathy. I am
changed by the friends, family and LOVE of God that I have been surrounded by
this past summer. I am not the same Birkleigh I was at the beginning of the
summer and I hope that the same love I experienced would spread like a virus, a
love virus to all the people in my life, past, present and future.
I leave for Spain on October 2nd
all because of the divine heavenly provision of God and I can’t wait to be
romanced by Jesus in this season in Spain. We’re going to change the world
together. We’re going to do it one person at a time, making every moment count
and see miracles unfold everyday. I am confident that the little sacrifices are
making waves in heaven, and I can no longer live for myself. I am truly nothing
without my Heavenly Father. I’m trusting God for the rest of my support raising
and I can’t wait to see how He does it. I know one thing, He always out does
Himself and goes above and beyond. Keep praying for me as I embark on this
journey and next season of Romance and Rest with Jesus. I’m really looking
forward to the teaching, growth and challenge I’m going to receive at G42.
There are many speakers, teachers and leaders from all over the world coming to
us in the fall, and I’m going to eat it up. Thank you for all your prayers,
love, support and please keep in touch with me via email ([email protected] or through my blog).
God may be
speaking to you through this blog, and if He is, great! I hope He’s asking you
to trust Him. He wants His best for you and He’s patient. He wants heaven to
invade your world. In heaven there are no impossibilities, doubts or self
sufficiency. He wants to love on you and lavish His love on you everyday. Let
Him in a little more and watch the mountains in your life move. He’s all about
being glorified, and He’s the best storyteller ever. Let Him be the Author and
Perfector of your Faith today. Get em’ Jesus!!!
