I boarded the plane, 6 am; WAY too early for my liking.
I plotted to keep my headphones in the entire flight, avoiding talking to anyone around me. I needed coffee before even trying to engage with any other humans around me.
I sit my half-asleep self down on an aisle seat next to a kind-looking blonde lady and her about 6 year old son.
I settle in, put in my headphones, and close my eyes as I rest my head on the leather airplane seat.
My current favorite song starts playing:
“and I will sing of all you’ve done
I’ll remember how far you’ve carried me.
From beginning to the end
You are faithful, faithful to the end.”
(Faithful to the End, Bethel Music)
The kind-looking blonde begins to look over at me and smile, almost longing for me to take out my headphones and talk with her. I ignore it.
The flight attendant asks what I would like to drink, I pause my music and can’t get the word “COFFEE” out fast enough. Okay, back to the song.
“There wasn’t a day you weren’t by my side
There wasn’t a day that you let me fall
All of my life you love has been true
In all of my life, I will worship you.”
The words of this song bring memories back to me and they begin to play in my mind like a movie. I think back to moments throughout the Race when I was broken down and how the Lord came in like the Savior He is, and rescued me. I sat there (still half asleep) in awe of that journey he took me through and managed to pray under my breath, “Lord, show me that kind of faithfulness on this trip to Georgia.”
As my steaming hot cup of “wake-me-up” arrives, my seat neighbor takes out a large book and a bible. The caffeine starts to take its effect, and now I’m alert enough to be intrigued and notice that large book is a devotional.
I take out one headphone and ask what devotional she is reading.
This question leads to an answer, which leads to a full conversation about the incredible goodness of our mutual Heavenly Father.
Any grumpiness that came with waking up at the crack of dawn faded with each encouraging word that came from her mouth.
Our plane lands and we find ourselves having to end our life-giving conversation.
I begin to exit the plane and I wave goodbye to my two new friends and think to myself, “Wow, Lord you sure did show me your faithfulness already.”
I make another joyful friend on the walk to the baggage claim. “There you go again, Lord. What a great day, and its only 9 am!”
There I was, 70 liter, 45 pound, backpack mounted on my back, day pack on my front, ready to embark on my three week journey in Georgia, armed the joy given to me by my Father through new found friends on the plane ride here. Nevertheless, my fear level was almost as high as it was one year earlier when I arrived to Georgia for the first time for my Training Camp. I was about to step into a new season, and I sure as heck couldn’t do this on my own.
“There won’t be a day that you’re not by my side
There won’t be a day that you let me fall
In all of my life, your love will be true
With all of my life, I will worship you.”
Holding on tightly to those words and accepting them for the truth that they are, I stepped out of that airport and into my next season.
I would be lying if I said the first few days of Squad Leader training were as steady as my flight to Georgia.
I was starting a brand new journey and hadn’t spent much time processing the fact that my 11 month journey was actually finished and now I was starting a completely new one. SCARY.
The comfort of the familiar faces of my squad wasn’t there, in fact I didn’t really know anyone, sparking the uneasy feeling within me.
All that unsteadiness disappeared the first few hours of actual training. I sat in circle formed by chairs filled with other now alumni racers starting their squad leading journey. Someone in the circle prays, “Lord, let us bring nothing but ourselves, who you created us to be, into this season”
Those words were spoken, and all my fear was gone. I was free to operate in Bethany, and only Bethany. I was equipped for this, the Lord had prepared me for this moment, and I was armed with His strength.
Flash forward two days.
My hands are literally sweating with anxiousness ready to meet the new squad of people I would be leading for the next 5 months.
Mid-conversation, I see a sea of red shirts walking up the hill. There they are. M SQUAD. My new family for the next 5 months. AHHHH. (insert slight freak out here)
I meet them all within a few hours and fall in instant love, the kind of love that you just can’t explain with words.
I could sit here and type out every moment of Training Camp that impacted me greatly, but honestly I would be here forever, cause those 10 days were days filled with moments that shifted so much for me…
There was one particular moment though, that will stick with me for a lifetime.
At training camp, there is a particular day that is dedicated to dealing with past pain and emotion. A year ago, at my training camp, that day was a day that I took a giant leap and started a journey of healing and restoration. I sat there, sitting and leaning against the wall, bawling as I wrote out the words the Lord was giving me in that moment. Now, one year later, I sat in that exact same spot and beamed with pure and utter joy and celebration. I was sitting in the exact same place, yet as a new person. Healed, restored, refreshed, renewed.
That “movie” that played in my mind on the flight to Georgia replayed in that moment. I thought of those moments that took place in multiple countries around the world where the Lord showed me His faithfulness. Moments in which he picked up my broken and tattered heart, healed it and brought it back to life, restoring it in full.
That very night I literally jumped and shouted for what seemed like hours in celebration and awe of the work He had done in me.
“Look where You have taken me. Look at the restoration you have done in me. I’m not the same, I’m new. Yep, you ARE faithful. You were faithful then and you are so faithful now.”
As I prayed those words to my Father, He spoke back to me, “I was faithful then, I am faithful now. Now, I have placed you here to walk with this group of people on the same journey I took you on.” Yep, you guessed it, ALL the tears streamed down my face as a new movie started playing in my head. This time I saw the faces of my new squad and I watched as the Lord picked up their broken and tattered hearts, healed them and brought them back to life, restoring them in full.
The Lord has placed me here in this season to for a divine purpose, to lead a group of new racers into the same journey of healing and restoration that He took me on. I feel so unworthy, but so humbled to get to walk with these incredible warriors in the Faith throughout this next year.
Here they are: M Squad. Gosh, I love these people.
Those 10 days of training camp came to an end and I say goodbye to my M squad family for 6 weeks until October, when we officially begin our journey together!
2 days later I reunite with my Y Squad family, the ones I spent my 11 month Race with. It was like breath of fresh air to be in their presence again. Every second of that week at Project Searchlight was filled with joy. I spent hours telling my previous squad mates about my new squad and how I was so honored to be apart of their World Race journey. My fellow Y squad-ers showered me with love and affirmation and I did the same in return. That week reminded me of the family the Lord had gifted me with, and somehow I knew that my journey with them was not over, in fact it was just beginning.
My Y Squad family reunited at Project Searchlight:
And just like that, my time in Georgia came to a close and I found myself on a plane back to Texas. Luckily, this flight was in the evening so my energy level was much higher than the previous flight. Nevertheless, I put my headphones in and you’ll never guess what song comes on. Yep, you guessed it:
“and I will sing of all you’ve done
I’ll remember how far you’ve carried me.
From beginning until the end
You are faithful, faithful to the end.”
As the song plays, we begin our decent into Dallas. As we land, I watched a breath taking sunset created by the Creator Himself. Tears begin to fall down my face again as I thought of the faithfulness He showed me throughout my three week journey in Georgia. That night, as I jumped into my warm, comfy bed at home, I sang those words over and over again with joy in my heart.
Rest assured that I’ll be singing of that faithfulness for forever, because it has never failed, and it never will.
