My mom recently told me that I am the “Alice in Wonderland” of our family. I am the adventurer. I love that and would never replace that role. I’ve always dreamed of exploring, making the world my home, meeting unique people along the way and listening to their incredible stories. However, being whimsical and a free-spirit is a bit unconventional and impractical for those of us who rely on monotony, security, and/or the manufactured “American Dream.”
We have a false sense of security here in America, which I have succumbed to. I know it is false because I live, driven by fear, nearly everyday. Anything horrendous could happen here and it has, yet we think that in another country something tragic is guaranteed to happen. We don’t completely avoid the outside world, no; we’ll occasionally test foreign waters by dipping our toes into fancy pools at westernized resorts and we’ll stroll the same touristy routes without ever stepping foot off the guided path. That would be far too risky for us American folk. Be sensible, of course, but don’t be rigid. Our rigidity and false sense of security leave us feeling “safe,” yet unsatisfied and we miss out. God did not call you, nor I, to an ordinary life. Why do you think we love adventure-filled novels and films? Why do we crave a life like that? Maybe it is because that is how we are supposed to live. I mean, I hope so!
I know our world is fallen. I know that people are dying of malnutrition, disease, addiction, and abuse. I know that people are being kidnapped, robbed, and murdered. I know that children are enslaved. I know that these things are devastating and scary. That is why I’m going. I am aware, therefore I must do something. It is entirely without ignorance that I am going for them. I am going so that lives will be changed for the better through Jesus. “I see you now, you will be saved.” I’d want someone to come for me.
I’m scared to go to these far-off places. I’m scared of harsh circumstances and unpleasant encounters. I’m scared of being sick while away from home. Heck, I’m scared of being enclosed in a plane for 10+ hours. This is where I’m vulnerable, and this is where an unparalleled dependence on Jesus will begin. That is powerful.
I thought my will to make this trip made perfect sense and I still have moments of clarity, but the closer I am to making the jump the more I think I must be a little mad. Alice says all the best people are. 😉
