January 8
This day brought the beginning of healing for me. As we started worship, I doodled words and phrases from the songs. When we got to the song “Good, good Father” the vision from the day before came back to me. (The vision from yesterday was a crack in the ground splitting into a ravine, then the ravine leading down to my heart. I wasn’t sure what that meant at the time). This vision came back to me as I sang the lyrics “You are perfect in all your ways.” I was convicted by these lyrics. The Lord asked me—do you believe this? Do you believe that I am perfect in all of my ways?
Honestly, no.
I was led to repentance and weeping. I couldn’t believe that in the deepest of my heart, I thought my ways and ideas were needed. I believe that the Lord (the Creator) would need my ideas and suggestions.
The coolest part of this story was then seeing the vision shift and change. I saw the Lord take the two sides of the ravine and slam them back together. I saw the Lord reconnect my heart to His heart…there was no longer a ravine separating us. The realization that my personality, my past, my gifts, my abilities are all perfect because He is perfect in all of His ways.
This experience led to a sense of freedom and my burdens were lifted. Freedom leads to choice. I had the choice to choose His ways. I had the choice to trust His ways. However, this choice is daily. Daily choosing to live fully in today—in the plans and paths He has for me today.
That night I had another neat experience with the Lord as well. I had a vision of a man approaching me. I couldn’t tell who the man was and I resisted His presence. However, the Lord continued to present this image in my spirit. When I finally trusted the Lord, this man sat next to me, then I realized it was Jesus. He sat next to me, put his arm around me and held me. I realized that in the midst of all the chaos and teaching, I needed a friend. Jesus showed up as a friend for me to lean into and cry on.
This experience was amazing. I have never felt so close to Jesus. I have sensed him in front of me and with his hand on my back, but never holding me so closely and rocking me as I wept in His arms.
Psalm 37:7 “Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him.” On January 8, I rested in the Lord. I enjoyed his arms around me. Lifting me up. Sustaining me. Comforting me.
Prayers:
-I want to hear His voice clearly and let it guide me.
-I want to serve with abandonment.
-I want to a touch from Him—to bring healing and restoration.
-I want to be used by Him with the right motives.
-I want to be wooed by you, daily—in the little and big ways.
