generous: adjective
liberal in giving or sharing; unselfish, free from meanness or smallness of mind or character, large; abundant, rich or strong in flavor, fertile, prolific…
So…Generally speaking, I’d like to think of myself as a pretty generous guy with most areas of my life…If you disagree, feel free to call me out on that and we’ll chat it out. However, this story has little to do with my generosity…
This past Sunday, I found myself in a pretty interesting position. With all the traveling around Michigan and going down to Georgia for training camp and everything else, I haven’t been able to go to the church here in Muskegon for awhile. As I was on my way out the door, I noticed the $50 dollar bill my dad had left me (he had borrowed it a few days prior and don’t get the notion that I often carry or even have that much money often!) I looked at it and I did something I rarely do…I hesitated.
The first thought that went through my head was “you know benny…if you put that in your pocket, you know God is going to prompt your heart to give it for the offering…” The debate in my head probably took less than 3 seconds but felt like 10 minutes before I shoved it in my pocket and took off for church…We arrived slightly late and the $50 was excused from my mind as I did what I could to focus on worshiping God while not trying to compare the singing portion of worship with what I just left in Georgia…
until…yup, you guessed it!!! Time for the offering and as a man briskly walked to the front to pray over it, my mind started racing with all sorts of random thoughts…”well, you know your heart’s about to be prompted…but seriously dude, aren’t you suppose to be a good steward of what you have…you should do what you can to see if they can support you, not you just supporting them…you need to save what you have for STOP !!! God, you know where my heart is and you know that I’d give this freely to you, but I don’t want to do it out of stubborness because I normally would…I just want to know what you want me to do with it…”
It was at this time that I gained an instant peace as the words clearly came flowing to the front of my mind…”Keep it in your pocket…MY GENEROSITY DOES NOT DEPEND ON YOURS…” Wow! I’m going to repeat that because I think some of you reading this need to hear that as much as this guy usually does…”My generosity does not depend on yours…”
It can be so incredibly easy to fall into the trap of playing a game with God where we really think to ourselves that if I do this, if I do that, if I give up this, if I let Him do that, if I talk to him, if I let that go, if I, I, I, I…. than what??? Does that make the Lord God Almighty, creator of the universe obligated to do anything? What type of love is that? Since we were on money, you may even give me the biblical response that “well benny, He did say to test Him with tithing and He will fill our barns to so overflowing that we won’t know what to do with it…”…would He? yeah, I think so, but you’re missing the point if that is where you stay!
How many marriages, relationships, families and friendships are lost and wounded because we bring expectations and rights to the table that if I do this, it is your turn to do that??? Hmmm…this is getting long so I will write an entire blog on this past sentence and some more thoughts next! The point I’m making is that His love is generous and His mercy is generous and His grace is generous because He is generous and His generosity doesn’t depend on ours…He delights in lavishing us with goodness because “the king is enthralled by your beauty” (psalm 45)
I need to give you a little more of this story though. I got home and went about my business for awhile. Eventually I sat on the couch and checked my account status to see where I was financially for this trip. When I looked down, I found an unexpected present that touched my heart deeply. Some anonymous donor had dropped $1900 into the account while I was at church! That is an incredible amount of money and I can’t start to thank whoever that was… Not only because it is a ton of money, but because they were faithful to give when God prompted their heart…Some of you might be thinking “hmmm…that’s a ton of money and there’s no way I could have given something like that…” You know what…I wouldn’t always in my life be able to say this, but I’m fairly certain I can right now with sincerity that the amount you give to help me do this beautiful thing is not what touches my heart the most. What touches my heart is the generosity of love, prayer, friendship, encouragement and then money you’ve given to me throughout all these years…I value you my supporters, readers and prayer warriors so incredibly much and I cannot even fathom how much God will do through your faithfulness in me during this upcoming year…
So I encourage you to live a life of generosity in all that you do and in all that you are…for He is faithful and He is good and His best is yet to come!!! Meanwhile, know that His generosity does not depend on yours…
