So this is Goodbye,
The weight of it all is starting to sink in, I’m leaving a big part of my heart behind with all of my friends and family here at home. My heart goes out to you all, and I my appreciation for each and everyone of you has dramatically increased. I will miss you all terribly and I can’t explain how much you all mean to me. If it was humanly possible to be in two places at the same time I would. The hardest part about leaving is leaving behind my family, friendships, and ministry here. But when He calls, I have to answer… I wouldn’t have it any other way. He gave me His all, the least I can do is the same…
The Race is a dream come true, an answer to prayer, and a fulfilled promise. The Race is also a sacrifice, leaving my life behind in obedience, and a call to look well beyond my world as I look through the lens of God’s eyes and heart.I fell in love with God as a teenager and as a result I fell in love with His people. My life has been an adventure, one that many don’t understand, but I hope it shows people the heart of a God who desires to be involved in the life of each and every one of His children. He saved me from myself, He gave me life, and He gave me His life. Apart from Him, my life has no purpose, in Him I soar on eagle’s wings. I was selfish, He saw my potential. He knew me before I was born and had plans for me even before I even opened my eyes for the first time. I was dying and He gave my life and I now I have died to my old self so I could experience real life in Him. His love is all I need to live.
And I now I leave in just a few days for the next part of the journey, the next part of the Race I’ve been running for a long time. It’s that Race that showed me the heart of God… The one that taught me how to smile when I saw little kids with nothing, full of joy, and smiling with rotted teeth. The one that taught me compassion when I saw two filthily clothed orphans wrestle for a five cent pop can to survive. The Race where I saw a pregnant woman wasting her and her child’s life away as she was inhaling paint thinners to to forget the pain in her life. The same Race that burdened my heart for a mother that didn’t have the money get her handicap son an adequate wheelchair or for the little boy standing outside the hut, without a father, and with a mother who has to sell her body to keep food on the table. The same Race that brought tears to my eyes as I attended the funeral of a Father’s son who hanged himself because of the deathly grip of poverty that most of our world lives in everyday. The same Race that allows me to see the pain in the live of others and in turn see the potential they have in Christ. The one that taught me to love the lost, the forgotten, the downtrodden, the rejected, the oppressed, the unloved, and the list goes on and on. The is life within God’s hands, this is the Race of Christ-like living, and this is what I was created for… And when I’ve completed the Race, I hope my grave stone says, “Apart from Christ there is no explanation for this life.”
God Bless and I love you all with everything I am,
Benjamin Gagne
