I leave in one month. Four weeks and three days from now I will be almost to Atlanta to begin training, and shortly after I will leave with my team to our first destination. Surely I have been aware that my leaving date is getting closer and closer, but something about tomorrow being August 1st makes it seem really CLOSE.
I have “left” a lot of different times in my life. I left for India for a month when I was 16. I left for college in Colorado after high school. I left and spent 6 months in China a couple years ago. However, there is something about this leaving that is different.
Maybe it is that I am going for a year. Maybe it is that I’m going for a year and still don’t know exactly where I’m going. Maybe it is that I’m a littler older and wiser this time…or maybe it is more than that.
Something about leaving for a year and leaving everyone and (almost) everything behind leaves me feeling a plethora of mixed emotions. I am sad to leave my friends and my family, and I am excited to get to know my team. I am a little uncomfortable about the thought of leaving the comforts of home, and I am thrilled at the opportunity to see how few comforts I really need. I am concerned about leaving my support network, and I am in anticipation of learning what it means to truly rely on God’s support. There are so many more, but it is all very similar–I am leaving what is comfortable and venturing into what is unknown. It is scary, exhilarating, exhausting and stimulating all at the same time.
As I have gone through the preparation process so far I have learned one thing: God gave me the heart and passion I need to go and love on people around the world–and that’s all I need to know. He will be there with me every step of the way and he will take care of the details. He wants me to keep my focus on him and on preparing my heart to break, ache and GROW as I discover more and more of his heart for the world.
