Dangerous Prayer, Dangerous Answer

I’d been begging the Lord to teach me….

*The joy of the Lord is my strength.
Lord, teach me what this really means. What’s it like for my joy to ONLY be
from you. I want this.

*Discipline. What is it? Discipline me
for you and your goodness.

*1 Corinthians 7:35 “…But I want
you to live in the right way, to give yourselves FULLY to the Lord
without concern for other things.” I desire this. Teach me.

It would probably be helpful to you if you read my latest blog Divine Appointments
first. This is what happened the next two weeks on the boat. Surely,
not what I would’ve expected, but the Lord is good…all the time.

Funny how the next morning I woke up
barely being able to talk and lots of pain in my throat. I knew it
was an attack from the enemy. It’s not gonna cut it. Rebuke that in
Jesus name, it wasn’t time yet to be healed, He wanted to use this
attack for His glory. That day the Lord told me… “Seek me, I am
here. Praise me in this storm. I am still working new things in you.
Do NOT be frusterated with what this may look like, it’s a new work
in you Becky.”

So the rest of that day I rested in the
Lord. Day 2 came and went, still sick. Day 3. I didn’t understand
those last words completely…”Do NOT be frusterated” until Day 4
came. I woke up super excited! My throat was feeling good enough that
I could do ministry or so I thought. Then He told me yet again, “I
want you with me again today.” Ugh, I was so frusterated, I did
everything I could not to burst into tears. I felt like He grounded
me, and each morning I’d wake up and ask Him if I could do ministry
anyways, but of course He didn’t budge. I can’t talk my way out of
the Lord’s plans. As I fought back the tears, He said, “It’s the
discipline-I am your Father I know what is best for you. Obey me.”
Fiiiiiiine, I’ll stay. The Lord was so good to me these days,
continuoulsy breaking me of myself and healing my heart from things
of the past. It was great together, emotionally draining but
fulfilling. I soon realized this being grounded deal was going to
last the rest of our time there. No nothing so I could FULLY seek
Him.

Each step of the way He comforted me
and taught me in abundancy….

The joy of the Lord is my strength. I
truly learned what this meant. He took everything away, got me down
to rock bottom. I couldn’t do ministry so I could not find joy in
that. I spent the majority of the day by myself so I couldn’t find
joy in others. I wasn’t healthy, no joy here. Then to top it all
off something from home that brought me joy was broken, so couldn’t
turn there. I lost it all. All of it. One thing after another. And
the words Jesus had for me were… “AM I ENOUGH FOR YOU? WILL YOU
STILL CHOSE ME? LET ME BE YOUR JOY!” When ALL is stripped away the
Lord is STILL enough! We often focus so much on the branches. On the
good and the bad in our lives and we base our lives off of the
weather that’s around us. This just in: It’s NOT about the branches
making it through the weather, it’s ALL about the ROOTS! When we
redirect all our focus to the ROOTS and growing them deeper we’ll be
able to withstand any weather. 

Discipline. What is it? It is obeying
the Lord and His plans. “Our fathers disciplied us for a little
while as they thought best; but God disciplines u for our good, that
we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the
time, but painful. Later on, however it produces a harvest of
righteousness and peace for those who are trained by it.” Hebrews
12:10-11 😉 It is not easy, it hurts and is not
fun, but in the end it truly does produce a harvest of righteousness
and peace. For after going through this challenging two weeks I stand
stronger than ever on the greatness of my Lord and Father, Jesus
Christ.

To obey the Lord, in complete
surrender, conforming to His will, being joyful in Him alone with
sole focus on the roots; THIS is what it means to live FULLY for Him.

watch out, when you pray ‘dangerous’ prayers He’s ready to give you some ‘dangerous’ answers.

MUCH LOVE.