Last week our team went to summer camp with the youth from the church where we are staying and it was absolutely amazing. I got to see Holy Spirit really moving in these kids’ lives and have fun with them at the beach/sand dunes/in a color war all the while. Typically our Sabbath is on Saturday here, but the rest of the squad was planning to volunteer at an event on Saturday so they took their Sabbath on Friday instead. Since we were still at youth camp on Friday, on Saturday we had the option of taking our usual Sabbath or helping at the music event. I asked God where He wanted me and I had a vision of helping a girl with brown hair, wearing a stripped shirt so I knew I needed to go to the event.
The event was a completely different environment than I was prepared for and while I thought I would be able to do the task well, I quickly learned that I was the girl with brown hair wearing a stripped shirt that needed help. I needed help processing times from my past when I put myself into dangerous situations, but also processing the situation at hand. Typical music festival actions were occurring; drugs, drinking, kissing, maybe more, but you could see that it was from a place of such brokenness. There were kids there that we offered water, help, walks to cars to that were 14, 15, 16 years old that were drunk and or high on whatever kind of drugs. It was really difficult to see, especially following the youth camp because the kids at the event were some of the same ages as the kids from camp and I couldn’t help but to think about the possibilities of their futures and how much I want them to be protected.
I understand the desire to fill the void, self soothe in any way, and to seek attention/affection from whomever will give it to you because I have been there. However, I have also gotten to experience the bountiful, abundance of love from God and it is so much better than anything created by man could be, no pain, no negative vulnerability, no hurt, no brokenness. I learned my lessons through difficult situations and seeking better, but I wanted to show the kids we were offering help to that there is so much better and they don’t have to experience the bad to get something good.
My heart absolutely broke for those kids and the one thing God was constantly reminding me was that external wounds are easy to recognize because they are tangible and you can see when they’re healing, when they’re big, but internal wounds and brokenness can be present and nobody else may ever know, they may never ask, and that wound will never heal without the proper care through love. At training camp I prayed this prayer “God, wreck my life. Do whatever you want with it, put me into uncomfortable situations so I can grow,” and it took until Saturday night for me to truly recognize how dangerous, but awesome that prayer was/will be. If you’re reading this, on the topic of prayer, please just shoot up a prayer for all of the people I interacted with at camp and at the event, pray they will find fulfilling love from The Father and that their lives will be transformed from a place of brokenness to a place of light, joy, and happiness. A place where they can just be a kid and find value in themselves.
