The RACE is not easy. REPEAT: THE RACE IS NOT GLAMOROUS, NOR IS IT A YEAR LONG VACATION.
I think there are preconceived notions that the race is just some fun trip around the world. YES, it is a trip around the world, but it is NOT for my benefit or some luxurious trip. There is a common theme among the race where you “die to self”. This phrase can sound kind of odd, but I interpret it to mean that we give up our comfort and our selfish nature to serve others.
THE RACE IS NOT EASY.
I am being S T R E T C H E D and PUSHED outside my comfort zone. So far, that has looked like being in community with 18 other girls 24/7, sweating every single second of every day (no this is not a joke), never having air conditioning, reducing the amount of food I eat, not having constant working Wi-Fi, and never feeling CLEAN!
However, I think the hardest part that I’ve wrestled with this month is questioning and rediscovering who Becca is.
***(Insert vulnerable part here)***
I knew I was going to grow and learn on the Race, but I was not planning on going through a major identity crisis. After all, I like who I am and I felt pretty confident in who Becca is.
Being on the Race naturally creates an environment that challenges you to dig into questions like “Who am I?”, “Where am I at in life?” and “Where do I want to go?”, “Who do I want to be?”. I don’t know about you, but I believe these are some D E E P questions that require a lot of attention and they require you to go to places you don’t necessarily want to go to. It requires you to REVEAL parts of you that you do not necessarily like about yourself. However, I am discovering that you have to go to those places if you want to grow and learn. This can be challenging and I am only 10 days into this journey. WOW!
Thinking you know something and then realizing that you don’t can be SCARY. That is what I am experiencing right now. I have been a Christian for almost 10 years. Through these 10 years, I have let my identity be defined by my achievements, the different roles I’ve played, my feelings, and who others say I am. I am not necessary saying these things are bad, but they aren’t my TRUE identity. My true Identity comes from who God says I am:
~BEAUTIFUL~
~WORTHY~
~LOVED~
~PURE~
~FREE~
And NOT the lies the devil tells me:
~UGLY~
~UNWORTHY~
~UNLOVEABLE~
~IMPURE~
~UNREDEEMABLE~
I am still learning who I am and who GOD says I am. That is okay!! We never quite arrive. I believe we are in process until the day we die. Sometimes we just need a reset button to be reminded who we truly are.
I BELIEVE THE WORLD RACE IS MY RESET BUTTON.
Well, I think that is all for now.
THANK YOU for reading and please continue to keep me in your prayers and thoughts.
Love you all!
-B
