This is hard. It’s hard for me to continually post and ask for supporters for my trip, because all the excuses come to mind. “They have their own needs” “All they see is you asking for money” “people are going to get tired of seeing you post about it over and over” “do you care about anything else” “are you just asking for their money” And then I look at a calendar and that brings a whole other level of anxiety and stress.
A lot of days, I battle with those thoughts. Some days I don’t post about fundraising because I don’t want people to believe that all I am doing is begging for money. BECAUSE IT’S NOT THAT AT ALL!!!!! Trust me if I could fund this whole trip on my own I totally would however I CAN’T.
I was talking to one of my leaders and she just encouraged me to BE STILL before the Father, not stressing about money, not stressing about meeting a deadline, just be still before Him and allow Him to lead you in the direction that is most beneficial for you at this time. I tried to hold it together, but tears just ran down my face (in the middle of Starbucks I might add) because she was so right. I had been so focused on a number on a deadline that I forgot to honestly sit down and ask God and allow Him to show me the way to go! And then I remembered some advice from a squad mate who said “keep using your blog to share what God is doing, allow people to be inspired by your story” and I felt the push to share another blog, and really break down why I had chosen to be a missionary and the different things the Lord has taught me through my trips over the years.
It began in 2009; a friend of mine had applied to go on this month long trip to Africa. She sent me the website and I looked at it. It talked about serving orphans and street kids, house to house ministry and such. It sounded cool; I was so excited for her! She then hit me with “I really think you should apply too” HAHAHAHAHA! Yeah right!! I’m 19 years old; I am not applying to go across the world. But day after day for weeks, she would encourage me to apply. Well I looked again at the website, and figured it was a pretty big company so they probably wouldn’t accept me anyways. Let me apply so that she will leave me alone. So I went through the application process and submitted the application. I didn’t tell any friends or family because I KNEW I wouldn’t be accepted! WWEEELLLLL I was driving down the road one day, and I get a phone call from a number I don’t recognize and I answer it. It was this company who was hosting the trip to Africa. So I pull over and have a chat with them, and they ask me to write down a series of numbers and letters. After they finished they asked me to remove the numbers, what did it spelled? ACCEPTED! WAIT WHAT?!?! I had just been accepted to go on a month long trip that summer to Uganda, Africa. TIME OUT!!! WHAT?!?!?
Well I then decided to share it with my mom and the rest of the family and close friends. I accepted all the information and choose to go! Over the next 6-9 months the Lord spoke SO CLEARLY about me going to Uganda. IT WAS THE CRAZIEST THING EVER!!!! I had NEVER experienced the Lord like that! A few examples were one weekend I was at Acquire the Fire (a trip my best friend and I did every year). This year it was my best friend as well as the girl who had encouraged me to apply for the trip. Well there was a guest speaker there for the weekend. Where was he from?? UGANDA!!
Then one day I was listening to the radio to one of the local stations and one of the DJ’s Shaggy was talking about how he heard about listeners traveling throughout the year and he said I don’t care where you go, you should bring me back something from each country!! Even if you go to Uganda!! (What?! Yeah trust me that was my reaction too). And the list literally goes on and on of moments just like those. Where I could no longer deny the fact that Uganda was exactly where I was supposed to be. There ended up being a group of 5 of us that traveled together for this trip, where we met up with 80-100 others who would also be traveling to Uganda and other countries that summer.
It was time that we finally traveled to Uganda. Let me just tell you to this day, that trip has such vivid memories for me. It was during that summer that I knew the Lord had called me to be a missionary!!! I had no idea what it would look like but I knew that’s was my calling! The Lord totally wrecked my heart in the most beautiful way, working with orphans, ex-child soldiers, entering villages just days after they had been raided by the LRA, and street kids that we spent every morning and night with. I have NEVER been the same from that moment in my life.
Then in 2010 I had the opportunity to attend another mission trip with my church. We would spend 2 weeks traveling around different schools within different cities teaching against the use of drugs and alcohol, along with the father’s love for each of them. This was a tough trip for me. God really opened my eyes and did a lot of stretching and growing for me through this trip. He taught me what it looked like to truly rely on His strength and tap into His unending love not only for me but for these complete strangers that we had the opportunity to spend time with. But still I knew my life calling was to be a missionary.
I was never afraid to get dirty, work hard, get jobs done. But also take time to meet people exactly where they are and love them regardless of what their story was.
In 2011 my life as a missionary took a little bit of a turn. Instead of serving as a missionary overseas, He opened up an opportunity for me to work alongside of a Christian Hip-hop Ministry, Raiderz of the Lost. As part of their ministry team, we were able to bless people during concerts through the product table, prayer team and other events that they were a part of. One of the bigger events they did was a 2 week youth summer camp in Texas. I was able with a few other teammates to go alongside them in these 2 weeks and experience whatever God had planned for us. It was SO much fun working with youth kids, seeing how the Lord was chasing after each one of their hearts so individually and watching them use their gifts to bring Glory to God. One of the last nights, instead of having a full service they had a worship night. I remember this night very clearly I heard the Lord speak so detailed to me that night. He spoke to me about a missionary school that I had glanced at in the past. He spoke “YWAM DENVER JUNE 2012” I remember that night before bed; I looked to see if they were even having a semester at that time of year and sure enough they were. After those two weeks, I still served alongside of the ministry but I also began the steps needed for the next chapter.
In June of 2012, I entered into Youth With A Mission (YWAM) Compassion Discipleship Training School. This school is a 5 month program. 3 Months you are on campus in Denver learning different topics. The topics ranged so wide from Father Heart of God, to Spiritual Gifts, to Bible studies and so much more. We also were required to do weekly outreaches around the city. We had the opportunity to put into practice so much of the skills we were learning in class. After the 3 months you finish with 2 months on the mission field. I had the opportunity to go to India!
Never in a million years would I have thought that I would end up in India! These were probably 2 of the most life giving months I had ever lived. I had been set free of SO many things that I fought through my entire life and I was able to go out and just LOVE on people of ALL ages! The biggest promise I remember learning from this time was during a ministry opportunity we had to go into the red light district for a service. I and another team mate went for this service and as she spoke 2 little girls came in and sat in my lap. These two girls were dirty, their clothes were not clean, and they had probably been used for money more times than I could count. And I remember their sweet smiles, and I heard the Lord say “My life never gives up. My love never fails” No matter how messy our lives get there is NOTHING that we can do great or terrible that would change the Father’s love for us!
As we ended our time in YWAM, I remember asking the Lord where He wanted me to go next. He simply told me “youth” and I felt like a whole new passion was sparked inside of my heart for youth kids.
As I returned home, I reconnected with my youth pastor and began serving alongside of him.
2013 until now I haven’t take any overseas trips, but I really dug deep into my youth group and completely fell in love with each of these kids. Again the Lord kept missions alive and showed me practical ways to serve as a missionary right here at home! I feel like I have a new passion for these kids, as if they are my own. I have had incredible leadership. My youth pastor has taught me so much about what it looks like to run a ministry, how to prepare and deliver a sermon, events and so many ins and outs of youth ministry. To the point of where I feel like I want to one day possibly become a youth pastor!
2015 was a tough year for me. There were a few twist and turns life threw at me personally as well as within our church family. We dealt with a lot of people passing away. People who I personally felt like were pillars at our church in like 6 month time frame were all now just gone. So it was a super rough patch for me, and it also kicked me into gear. I sat down with the Lord one day and just reflected on the year and asked what does 2016 look like?! I remember hearing Him say “World Race” September/ October. I didn’t really know what that meant for me.
Now at this point I had heard about the world race like 5 or so years ago. But I made up every excuse and every reason why I SHOULDN’T do the world race, only for the Lord to ask me to pursue it now. So I began the process, the interview, the phone interview, and I WAS ACCEPTED. The day I was accepted I remember being in the middle of a text conversation with a friend. I was in tears just struggling with does God have more for me?! And I received a call letting me know I had been accepted into the World Race. Again I had tears but this time was for a different reason, this time was because I heard the Lord say “Now is your time”
So here I am beginning of September, I have gone through almost 6 months of preparation, fundraising, training camp and now a little less than 1 month away from leaving for 11 months! WHHHAAAATTTT!!!! (You can read more about the details on applying for the World Race and how the Lord changed my heart over the 10 day training camp a few weeks ago in my past blogs)
Back to what I started off saying, this has been a super stretching and hard 6 months for me. I have had to reach out to others, share my heart and ask people to support me financially. As you can see on the bar above I have a good amount of money to rise. So I have reached out to friends, family, coworkers, and everyone in between in hopes to receive enough to support to go on this journey.
I am currently 13 days way from needing a total of $4,610. (This will put me to a total of $10,000 and I would be over 1/2 way fully funded!!!) I would be lying if I told you the amount of days verses the amount of money I need hasn’t overwhelmed me. Its cause me to question if I am on the right path. And then He brings me to write this blog, and not only share my full story with you but also to remind myself that GOD IS FAITHFUL. I totally believe God to move in crazy ways over this next year, and this is just the beginning!!! You can totally be a part of the way the Lord moves over the nations this year!!
I know it’s hard to honestly see how can you be used, but by financially supporting me you and opening up doors for the Lord to move through me and through you as I embark on this new adventure!
I am asking you would you consider joining me in this incredible journey that the Lord has placed me on?!
Upcoming Events:
I am placing another order for t-shirts on Monday! They are $20 for adult sizes and $15 for kid sizes! If you would like one please contact me with your size! I will be ordering extra however I want to make sure I have the correct size for you!!
September 16th I am hosting a fundraiser dinner! One last large event before I leave! Come eat with me! There will be local entertainment! I will also be sharing more of what the Lord has been teaching me over these last few months! Tickets are $25 in advance and $35 at the door!
**LASTLY** I am looking for people who are willing to write me letters to take with me on the race!! I will not be able to receive mail while overseas, so being able to open letters will be super awesome!! It can be letters, you can draw pictures, you kids can color a page for me whatever will be fun! You can be creative! You can write for a specific time that I experience (ex: holidays, or when I feel homesick, or when I need extra courage, or when I see God move in a whole new way ext…) or it can be for whenever throughout my race!! I will be collecting them up until I leave on October 1st!!
