Where to even begin. To be honest I haven’t written anything for the last couple of weeks cause I wasn’t sure what to write about. It seems like there are a hundred things to say and nothing at all in the same instant. Even right now as I’m writing this I feel weird and a bit torn.
We’ve been in Albania this month. We have fallen in love with the people and the Pastor and his family and the ministry that they do here. It was slow getting started but once it started it has been so great and a lot of unexpected fun. To be honest though, Albania has been hard for me, not the country but the month. I feel like it has been for a lot of us here.
It makes sense when you think about it, however. It’s month six. While we absolutely love this journey that we are on, and wouldn’t trade it or leave it for anything, still, we’ve been gone for half a year. Half a year of being away from our families and our friends and our lives. Half a year of pretty much never being alone but always being in the buddy system. Half a year of constant change and growth and pushing into the good and hard times. Half a year. A lifetime and an instant.
With us hitting this mile marker, the atmosphere is different. We are different. You can feel it in the air. We’re experienced. We’re somewhat veterans. But we also know we still have a long ways to go. As long as we have been gone is how much longer we have still to go. This is exciting and exhausting at the same time. The honeymoon is over and the real life choosing is upon us. And honestly, I love being in that place. That’s real life, that’s where the rubber meets the road. And believe me, our rubber has definitely met our road.
On top of this, this is the time of the journey where people’s real stuff comes up. We’ve all been growing and learning things this whole time, but I think we’re in the next level of the pruning process. For better or worse, we’re in the raw and those around us that we get to do life with can see it and experience it first hand.
Like I said at the beginning of this, I’m not really sure where I’m going with this. But I did want to write about where I feel our squad, my team, and in some ways, I am. This is not a place of downcastness, or discouragement, but of choice. Choosing to love those around you even when you don’t want to. Choosing to be happy about ministry and constantly be looking for other and new ways to serve both your team and the people who’s country you’re sharing for a month. It’s choosing to set down your book or movie or alone time (cause that is precious time) and love. Whatever that may look like, and whoever it may be poured out on.
Honestly, in this moment, I’m tired. But I am so beyond excited about where I am and where my team is. There has been so much joy and fun and growth and perseverance in this month. I have loved being here and I am so pumped about the second half of our journey. It’s all just beginning baby!!!
