“So what will you be doing on your missions trip?” — a question asked by many and, honestly, one I asked the Lord often.
I would ask him what he had, what he saw and all that was to come. After training camp all the possible ministry opportunities i’d been telling others and myself were confirmed: construction, encouraging church’s, speaking, prayer walks, and teaching english to kiddos/ vbs. All of these options are things that we have partaken in on the race and all have been incredibly sweet. I’ve given my heart to at least one kiddo or teenager in each place we’ve been.
Of all of these ministries, there is one that is challenging for me and it’s kids ministry. I love kiddos, 100%. I love walking away from a day full of teaching and playing and laughing both at each other as team mates and the little nuggets that steal our hearts. That being said, it’s not all highlights. Most days we hit the pillow completely exhausted. Having to keep high energy, rally kids that don’t speak your laungauge, or very little (lets be honest, it’s hard to do it with kids even when they do speak your language), and working together as a team can be a task that takes it out of you. Singing the same songs again and again, talking to yourself because there is no response, feeling inadequate and insecure.
For our first two months in Thailand we helped in a foster home and we loved it there so much. It was a ministry from 9-5 and we had it eveyweek for multiple days on top of other ministries. Malaysia was a lot of encouraging the church, house church visits (my fave) and then one weekend we helped plan and run a day camp for kiddos. This was a blast but it took a lot out of us too. India was almost all teaching english, helping in schools, vbs and then encouraging the church on sunday’s. That is 6 months of entertaining, pouring into, loving on and teaching kiddos. Needless to say, we are exhausted. As a team we were hoping to have a different type of ministry in Costa Rica. That didn’t happen.
My attitude was far from mature after hearing the news. Even so, the Lord in all his goodness and patience reminded me of some important truths that I need to be reminded of often
It’s not about me.
After an afternoon of pity parties and frustrated tears the Lord scooped me up and told me to wait. It’s so hard when your head knows one thing but your heart feels so strongly another way. So, I waited. That night I dreamt about the book I had been reading in India. I hadn’t picked it up in awhile, and had planned to bail on it and start the next book I have. I woke up and remembered dreaming about it. I looked and then found it in my backpack. I sat down at the table with my coffee, and after I finished my devos I opened it up. The chapter I left off at? “Appropriate smallness” – The practice of servant hood.” Ok God, I see what you did there.
The chapter starts with pride, explaining how pride destroys and steals so much from our hearts. It continues on talking about humility.
“Humility has to do with submitted willingness. It involves a healthy self-forgetfulness…we will know we have begun to make progress in humility when we find that we get so enabled by the Holy Spirit to live in the moment that we cease to be preoccupied with ourselves…”
It goes on talking about how so often pride fuels a hidden motive or notion in our hearts that if no one sees us serving, then it doesn’t really matter or count; we feel defeated when we don’t get recognition because the spot God calls us is out of the limelight and it’s hidden to many, even ourselves sometimes. We feel hopeless when we don’t see the fruit of our labor. Like fear, pride is a liar.
Jesus was the ultimate servant. God is the ultimate servant, or as said in the book:
God is the Infinate Servant. God is the most humble being in all the universe. Jesus did not come as a servant in spite of the fact that he is God; he came precisely because of the fact that he is God.”
shoot. oh, just wait.
The next section of the chapter is about a ministry Jesus took very seriously: Children’s ministry.
OK, I see you God!!!
The truths that hit me in the face and sank into my heart:
“So jesus took a little child … He told them their job was to welcome, to receive, to serve this little child. They needed to do this, not just for the child’s sake, but for their own. It is through servant hood that they will come to see the truth about themselves …
The primary reason Jesus calls us to sevanthood is not just because other people need our service. It is because of what happens to us when we serve.
We must minister out of weakness. The reason we help others is not because we are strong and they need us; it is because if we don’t help them, we will end up a hopeless relic.
Jesus took a little child in his arms and said, in effect, ‘Here’s your ministry. Give yourselves to those who can bring you no status or clout. Just help people. You need this little child. You need to help this little child, not just for her sake, but more for your sake. For it you don’t, your whole life will be thrown away on an idiotic contest to see who is the greatest. But if you serve her — often and well and carefully and out of the limelight — then the day may come when you do it without thinking, ‘What a wonderful thing i’ve done.’ Then you will begin to understand how life in the kingdom works.
Caring for children in and of itself — when it is bathed in prayer and offered with as much grace and energy as we can muster — is one of the most powerful tools for transformation available to us.
…yea. I think it has been made clear that God is allll over our ministry here. Those revelations and truths brought a perspective shift in my heart.
Yes, we will be continuing to be with kiddos, in fact we don’t have to, but we GET TO. Plus, we get to love on the ones in one of the darkest slums in Costa Rica. We get to serve many women and children at a business here. We get to help with the homeless for a half a day one weekend (YES), we get to spend 4 days in April at a beachside ministry (double yes!!)
The best part? It’s all about Jesus. He is trusting us with a ministry he himself held dear. He is teaching me what it means to truly humble myself. He is transforming my heart and opening my eyes to his kingdom on earth, and the transformations that happen when we surrender our own agendas, our hunger for clout, our narrow perspectives and our whole hearts. We GET to be his hands and feet. We GET to live in his overwhelming ever deep, ever full and whole love of Jesus. We GET to be here. We GET to be His.
God is good.
Please be in prayer for the squad and my team and I as we all start our ministries this week. Lots of crazy cool things are already beginning to bloom and we are expectant and hopeful for all God has for us not only these last 3 months but the rest of our lives.
Being in Costa Rica has been a big culture shock — it is very similar to America. Having gone from almost nothing, sleeping on concrete floors, icy bucket showers with water that usually quits working, heavy and unhealthy diet — village life, to suburbs, warm water, beds, wifi and WALMART, it has been an awakening to say the least. That being said, it is exciting to know and realize that soon I will be reunited with all my people and be home!! Please pray also for full strides and steady pace as I settle in these last few months and give my all to this place and these people. It’s bittersweet to think of the end.
Hugs and Love
Ave
