Here’s my why: I’m saying yes.
Can I be honest with you? I don’t know my “why” completely yet.
The over-thinker, analyzer and planner in me wants to sit here and elaborate on all the tiny details that have lead up to this moment, starting all the way from the beginning. (because it has truly been so miraculous and incredible). However, in this season I have had a dear friend of mine challenge me to step out of the excuse of an “over-thinker” and really look at the thoughts I allow my energy to have and I let them wreak havoc in my head, and then my heart. So, i’m embracing and letting flow the free spirit, expressive, go where the wind takes me, positive and joyful spirit of me be the one that I spend energy on as I share my heart with you today. These are the sweet freeing truths that my mind has been repeating and reminding me and that I have been clinging to in this season:
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“Just stop. Enjoy this moment. BE WHERE YOUR FEET ARE. Stop trying to go and plan and just trust. Fall recklessly into the unknown, knowing you’re known. You’ve been called, so go with a joyful and open heart. You’re seen. There is something here far greater than you can even imagine or understand, so just be. Just go”.…
To be honest with you, I don’t know why I am called to this unimaginable, incredible adventure that I GET to embark on. I don’t have all the answers, I don’t speak every language and know all there is to know, I don’t understand things, i’m young and I myself am still learning. I don’t know how to do or be everything that this trip entails. But, I believe it is these things that are why I and the people on my squad are called to this, and why this adventure is so beautiful. I cannot do this in my own strength and I cannot do it alone. I have to be dependent on God, I have to let people in and receive help that I so often keep at bay because “I can handle this”. It’s so amazing how God has been moving and teaching me as Im preparing for this adventure.
These are some of the truths that I’ve been being reminded of in this season:
God does not call the equipped, but He equips the called.
He is not looking for the perfect person but just the person who says: “ yes. Okay God, l don’t know, but you do, so let’s go”.
And that is where I am at. I don’t know, but He knows, and I am just going to say “yes” because I trust Him and I want to walk in the plan he has for me. It has been made so clear to me that this is where I am supposed to go and do and it is what I want to do more than anything. I felt called to this trip before I even knew it existed.
Going into my junior year of high school, I was in Macedonia for a missions trip and I felt like I was in the right place at the right time, and my heart had so much peace and joy. My heart is deeply moved and overflows when I get the opportunity to serve, really love, listen to and learn about people and a culture by being totally engulfed in it. It was here, in Macedonia, that He whispered to my heart that doing these things and going on an adventure, was my next step. God has taught me many things along the way, but Im not there yet, i’m not perfect and everyday i’m learning. He has given me gifts, he has blessed me with strong and solid spiritual mentors/friends/family to do this with, he has opened doors I didn’t know were possible and He has provided in more ways than I even knew possible. He has also closed doors I did not expect, he has guarded me from many things I didn’t understand, he has helped me persevere amidst trials and pain and not only ride them out, but rise from them. I’m learning that pain and perseverance are some of the best things to move us closer to our purpose and pull us closer to Jesus. Breakthrough and healing are so much better when you have fought for them and can then ,in retrospect, see the purpose in them and embrace the experience. He has began a work in me that only He could do, so that I can be all He is calling me to be and do, BECAUSE of Him. My favorite part? I know he isn’t done yet. I am unlike anyone else, and that is how he has equipped me. I am not perfect, I don’t know it all, but I’m saying yes. I’m following him in all of this and I couldn’t be more humbled, thrilled and open to any and all things that this trip has for my team and I!
Can I tell you something amazing? He does that same thing for YOU. He is working and moving in your life right now, in your situation and He is calling you too. You don’t have to travel around the world or do something extravagant in order for it to be a calling – all you have to do is say “yes” and start where you are, with what you have and just let him lead.
I hope this encourages you in someway or maybe gives you a glance into my heart and where I am with this whole experience. If this did encourage you or you have questions or just want to hear more, let me know 🙂
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Thank you for your support, love and encouragement in the special way you are providing it for me in this time; I truly couldn’t do this without the physical, spiritual, emotional and financial support from you all.
Hugs and Love
Aves
