When my best friend, Kelsey, asked if she could write a blog for all the people who hug their soulmates goodbye for a year, I immediately agreed to such a brilliant idea. She has been blessed with the gift of gab and can capture emotions in such a perfect way. Below of her raw feelings so eloquently put into words. Perhaps this can be an encouragement to anyone who won't be seeing life on the Race first hand, but instead will being seeing the Race through the eyes of their friend. So here it is ladies and gentlemen–advice for those who have or will soon be telling their best friend goodbye for 11 months.
What I love most about our friends is how in the midst of chaos, we always find time to dig beneath the surface of each others lives and get tangled in the roots of who we really are, to reveal the purest form of ourselves that can only be shared with a best friend. Because without judgement, not everyone gets to see you sprawled out on the couch in your most unattractive pair of pajamas with a face mask on. And not everyone gets to hear the brutally honest details that are often spared across the dinner table. We get to see the behind the scenes footage and bloopers that shape our lives, simply because best friends don't settle for the spark notes version of any story. Because if you're lucky, someday those stories will cultivate into something bigger than a dinner table conversation and start becoming the blueprints of a dream in the making. I once said, a best friend is someone that can be happy for you when opportunities come your way, even opportunities that will take them away from you. And when the time comes, as a best friend, embrace that moment because it is rare that you get to witness the seed before it's planted, the roots before the growth, and the movement behind the mission. And it is you that will get to watch their dreams unfold, eleven different times, in eleven different countries.
In the months leading up to Autumn's race I practiced missing her, in hopes that when the time actually came I would be ahead of the game. That perhaps I would have a better grasp on what life was like without her. I went to Target alone, just to find that I was looking for her between every other coat rack and calling her name with every stumbled upon sale tag. I once got a late night frosty, just to realize the straight to your thighs calories are not nearly justifiable if there's only one spoon in the picture. And so for months I continued to practice missing her while trying to fathom an entire year without her by my side.
They say practice makes perfect, but I'm here to tell you there is no adequate way to prepare yourself to be on the other side of this journey. To be on the other side of the rear view mirror, the other side of a text message that won't send because the burning bush in Africa doesn't have wifi, and to be on the other side of a disconnecting FaceTime call with a side of static for dessert. You simply cannot prepare for moments like that when you're currently walking through life with someone. So, if you're anything like me and your best friend decides to race the world like mine has, cherish the days that your paths are parallel and grow in the moments when they separated by oceans and going in opposite directions. I cannot promise you that a lonely passenger seat or empty chair at the dinner table will always be easy, but I can tell you that in those moments you will learn to love and appreciate what they bring to the table so much more then when they were just a game of footsie away.
As a World Racer, you can go ahead and count on missing the big moments that happen within a years time span. Such as, redundant holiday traditions and annual family vacations, or maybe even the day your best friend takes a different last name. But I've found that what I cherish the most are the little moments that are unpredictable and completely unexpected. Life will sneak up on you every once in a while and the overwhelming amount of missing someone who is worlds away will hit you in the face when you least expect it. And when it does, it will tug on your heart strings in ways you can't imagine. Because when you flee the country for 11 months it's a risk taken knowing you might miss something, but it's an absolute fact that you will be missed.
It was hard to accept the fact that my friendship with Autumn would take place through a computer screen over the next eleven months, and that our communication would be plenty in certain countries but scarce when you least expected it, and before you know it you're saying goodbye all over again. It is often hard to relate to your best friend who's doing door to door ministry, when the only door I'm consistently opening is the refrigerator. Autumn is pouring into peoples lives all over the world, and chances are I'm somewhere pouring myself another drink. Autumn is keeping track of everything she owns for the next eleven months in a backpack, and I am shamelessly keeping up with the Kardashians. She is leaving her handprint on the hearts of people all around the world, and not to mention, my cardigan that she left on the streets of India. So, perhaps I'm making a difference in this world too. Needless to say, our lives are far from parallel. But despite our differences, our friendship hasn't changed through the miles. It is nothing short of a blessing to have a friendship that is greater than any distance.
I'm fairly certain there is a season of life for everything. Just as there is a time for growth and grace, and a time for celebration and change. In preparation for this journey, I watched Autumn grow into the version of herself she wanted to be for this race and for her teammates. And now from a far, I am watching her grow into the person that God intended for her to discover through practicing simplicity, challenging her in different conditions, and serving in ways she's never served before. But in the midst of constant change, I've watched Autumn's pursuit of who God is in her life remain constant, by trying things out of her comfort zone just to find that God is far beyond the limits in which we confine his power and authority in our lives. It was hard to watch her go and I anxiously await the day she comes home, but I am content with loving her from a distance because it has been an absolute joy to to watch her thrive while she's gone. I once made a list of the things that suck most in life. Dry contacts, diarrhea, jet lag, hangovers, and heartbreak. And now, missing Autumn.
