There finally came a defining moment on the race where I realized how ridiculous my life was. It wasn't when I was riding elephants back in Nam, or randomly playing a hilarious game of UNO with Singapore Christians in Australia, or being pummeled, I mean, just pummeled by massive waves in the freezing cold waters of the India Ocean, or watching a sunrise over one of the 7 wonders of the world at Angkor Wat with hot chocolate in hand. Nope, it was cramming into the front part of a tuk tuk (aka a motorbike with a trailer/cab hooked up to it, aka a Cambodian taxi) because the cab was completely full with my team, completely exposed and hanging on for dear life; then, catching myself in a thought that I completely think this is normal. What?!? You drive around like this in America on major city streets and someone is going to jail. Then it hit me…my whole complex on what I thought was normal has changed.
I mean, I thought about driving my truck yesterday, and it seemed a foreign concept. I watch the Pursuit of Happyness and for a split second am horrified that Will Smith uses the tap water to brush his teeth. I can't remember what it's like to just go off alone somewhere and do whatever I want when I want, and to top it all off an Aggie won the Heisman!!! What is going on here???
It's insane. And I love it. The world is so different than I was led to believe. Life is so different than I was led to believe. Life is an adventure wherever you are for sure, but there is something so much sweeter in stepping out of your little home in the Shire (Hobbit reference) and living completely unaware of what to expect next. It's just all so new. On the race, your lifestyle changes majorly every month. The security of routine is destroyed, and as the fear of what that might look like in life fades with Gods goodness, it sets you free to embrace new things…free to embrace the adventure that life is.
We randomly got invited/crashed a wedding in Vietnam. It was the coolest reception!! And I got to fulfill my dream of not smiling in wedding pictures. Score…
I miss America, but I'm already seeing that in 6 months I'm gonna have no clue how to re-enter the lifestyle I once had. It's a weird feeling. I like to believe it will be like George in George of the Jungle when they bring him from the apes to the middle of San Fransisco. Great movie. Or maybe, just like in the movie, I might have the heart of the wild "jungle" so imprinted within me that the old "city" will become a new playground.
Either way, I had spent the first 3 months of the race with this ever fading feeling that this would all be over soon and I could get back to my normal life in the states. Now, I find myself comfortable with this lifestyle and admitted to my team just today that I'm finally no longer counting down the days. This race has fully become where I am at in life, and looking ahead and counting down is only something I do when I miss my family or friends. It's hard to explain, but normal is no longer what I thought it was, and I no longer long for the comfort of normality (most times). What I long for is Jesus. Comfort was and still is an idol that was more restrictive on the life of adventure and meaning than I thought.
Honestly, normal doesn't exist, just like security doesn't exist…outside of Christ. I'm not saying my lifestyle was wrong or bland, but I am saying that I was surrounded by familiar things that I'd known since birth which made me feel secure. My lifestyle now is beyond familiar, and somewhere in my mind I have adapted. I loved life before and I love it now, the difference is that now I've become more aware that breathing is done in the present, and it is impossible for my future to be secure. For security involves knowing, and I'll never know. However, I do know 2 things: that God works all things together for my good, and he'll never leave me…EVER. Trust in these 2 outstanding Truths has launched this small town Texas kid who never thought he'd leave the state and thought being a missionary was for crazy people, has now LIVED in 4 countries and has embraced that he is, in fact, living like a crazy person. And it's awesome!! Its adventure! It's ridiculous…when the heck did I decide this was okay? Rofl
*Pictures and captions added for effect to show how ridiculous my life happens to be right now.
