I have let the lies of Satan scare me. In the middle of praying, of crying out to God, I have let the lies of Satan create a fear so big that all I had were tears the rest of the night.
I was beginning to ask God to move and bring the Spirit into my fundraising. Fear, caused by a lie, filled me so much my next words were, “I’m scared you stoppped moving. I’m scared this is where it ends. I’m scared you changed your mind and don’t want me here. I’m scared you stopped moving. I’m scared you stopped moving. I’m scared you stopped moving.”
These words took over my prayer. My whole body cried out and I stopped being able to think of anything except my terror of not being loved by God and being left by Him. I know that none of it is true, but without thinking I was believing the lies so wholly I couldn’t let the truth in. In that one moment Satan played on two of my issues, fear and self-worth. He played an entire symphony with my tears and played it so loud I couldn’t hear the voice of God.
Voice breaking with sorrow, He called my name and spoke to me, “I am the Creator who loved you into being. You were made from love and for love. It is this love that sustains you, this love that dispells your fear, and this love that is asking you to lean into Me. Trust Me. Love Me. I have something big for you, but stay wih Me.”
