Well I wasn’t planning on writing another blog for another couple of weeks, but I think writing will help me organize my thoughts so I might as well make it a blog.
I’ve really been struggling this week. For some reason I just couldn’t seem to get any peace. I’ve been anxious and worried and I’m not sure why. So I went to talk to God about it and he told me it’s because I’m not trusting him…I mean I already knew that I didn’t trust him as much as I should, but today I saw that my lack of trust is a much bigger issue than I thought.
I saw that any relationship suffers where one or both parties don’t trust each other. I’m choosing not to believe what God’s word promises is true(even if I don’t always think of it that way when I worry or refuse to surrender something to him). And what’s more…it actually hurts God’s feelings when we don’t trust him. My grandmother has the gift of prophecy and she told me once that she saw a vision of Christ sobbing. She walked up and asked him what the matter was and he said he was sad because his people didn’t believe him….not non-christians…his people didn’t believe him.
So when I am worrying about how to raise the rest of my money I’m not believeing that God can provide for me.
*Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Matthew 6:26
When I am refusing to let go of romantic feelings I have for a person I’m not believing that God’s timing is perfect and He knows what is best.
*For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11
When I am worrying about how often I’m going to have showers and electricity so I don’t spend the majority of the trip looking like a hag…just joking…(but seriously I bet some of you ladies know what I’m talking about)…I’m not believing God when he says that a person’s appearance…yes, even a young single woman’s appearance…has absolutely nothing to do with how much they are worth in God’s eyes(and He doesn’t have opinions about how much anything is worth, He is the APPRAISER…and when He says someone is worth X amount…that’s how much they are worth no matter what the world says).
*But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7
When I am feeling dejected about the fact that I may have to give up everything and may never get to settle down and build a home , I’m not believing God when he says that I will be paid back with interest everything I give up here for his kingdom.
*And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or fields for my sake will receive a hundred times as much and will inherit eternal life. Matthew 19:29
So here is the challenge He has placed before me. Choose to believe that God has a perfect plan for my life that is much better than any I could come up with. Choose to believe that God knows exactly what He’s doing. Choose to believe that when my ducks are all over the pond and hanging from trees…God has all his billions of ducks in a perfect row. Choose to believe that God is good, he does not lie, he can do anything. Choose to believe his Word is true and then act on it! Drop everything of this world that I’m clinging to. Close my eyes and take a leap of faith…
And He promises that underneath I will find the Everlasting Arms!
