On the morning of April 21st I woke up at 3 a.m. with a strange feeling. The previous day I had experienced spiritual warfare unlike anything I had ever felt before. Upon waking, I continued to sense an overwhelming darkness that I could not shake. I felt strongly that I needed to stay back from the day’s activities.
Hours later I woke up to news that there had been an accident. Immediately, my heart began racing. The events of the past couple weeks remain a blur. I rushed to the hospital with my friend/teammate, Jennie. Two of my teammates (Chance and Vanessa), one of my squad leaders (Teresa), one of my squad mates (Kate), a pastor (Goodson), and a YWAM worker (Mosey) had been in a very serious car crash. Miraculously, everyone survived, yet there were many injuries.
My close friend and teammate, Vanessa, suffered the worst injuries. She had to have surgery to reconnect her severed spinal cord. The surgery went very well; however, she is currently paralyzed from the waist down. I say “currently” because she believes she will walk again. I, and so many others, also believe she will walk again.
A few days later, on May 25th, a catastrophic earthquake struck Nepal. My squad was scheduled to fly from India to the capital of Nepal, Kathmandu, on the 27th. Our plans to leave were put on hold due to the many uncertainties in the wake of the devastation.
I’ve been unable to find the words to write a blog since the accident occurred. I’ve been angry with God. I’ve been questioning Him. Why would He let something like this happen? Why Vanessa? She doesn’t deserve it. Why not me? Her whole life is turned upside down now. Why would He let thousands of people instantly die as a result of an earthquake? 98% of the people of Nepal are Hindu or Buddhist. Why had they not had a chance to hear about the love of Christ?
God heard me & reminded me of who He is.
1) God is all-knowing. He doesn’t make mistakes. I will never have all the answers. I cannot see the bigger picture that God sees. I can’t even comprehend His perfect plans because they are so far beyond my understanding. I don’t know why the accident happened, but I do know that Vanessa is in the palm of the Lord’s hand. She will be used as a beautiful testament of who God is and His glory will shine through her. Seeing Vanessa’s strength and reliance on the Lord through this tough time has already impacted my faith greatly. I am so blessed to have spent the past four months getting to know her. She is going to continue to do HUGE things for God’s kingdom.
2) God is faithful. He was there during the car accident. He never left Vanessa’s side at the hospital. He was present during the earthquake. He is everywhere at all times. Even when our back is turned from God, He never stops looking at us. He doesn’t miss anything.
3) God is love. Because He loves us, He has entrusted us with a purpose. He has given each and every one of His followers a command — make disciples of all nations. We’ve all heard it . . . many, many times before. But do we realize that it’s not optional? It’s a command. God wants ALL his sons and daughters to know Him. Only about 2% of Nepal’s population knows about Christ. My prayer is that this tragedy wakes believers up to the necessity of sharing the gospel with great urgency. If we had known death was coming to thousands of Nepalese ahead of time, would the Church have rushed in? Isn’t death coming for all of us? The Church should be rushing forward to each and every nation because it is only through Jesus that we overcome death.
That being said, I have no answers to the recent events that have occurred. I can’t try to play God when bad things happen. I can only trust that tragedy will turn into triumph. God has won. He is already victorious.
I am still in Bangalore, India (where I have spent the month of April) with Jennie and our squad leader, Dustin. I will be staying here with Vanessa and her parents until she gets out of the hospital. The rest of my squad is currently in Hyderabad, India for debrief. I will soon reunite with the squad in Nepal as we will be working alongside others to provide relief efforts there during the month of May.
Please pray for continued healing for everyone involved in the accident.
Please pray for a miracle in Vanessa’s recovery.
Please pray for the people of Nepal.
Please pray for my squad as we travel and minister in Nepal.
“I know your deeds; you have a reputation of being alive, but you are dead. Wake up! Strengthen what remains and is about to die, for I have found your deeds unfinished in the sight of my God. Remember, therefore, what you have received and heard; hold it fast, and repent.”
Revelation 3:1-3
I will miss living alongside my beautiful brothers and sisters in Christ. Due to team changes and Vanessa’s return to the States, team Aslan will temporarily split up…however, Aslan always returns! My teammates have loved me so well the past 4 months and I am so grateful for their friendship.
I love you Vanessa! You will be SO missed. I can’t wait to visit you in California.
