This morning I woke
up with such a bad attitude. I think it started because it was so hot and that
the power went out sometime in the night while I still had a cover over me and
the fan shut off. So when I woke up this morning I was drenched in sweat.
Then I thought about
all the other things that were bothering me.
It smells in our
room. I have to always cover my shoulders and wear something down to my ankles.
I am always sweating. I have to use a squatty potty. I can’t choose what I eat.
I have to eat. I have to pray. I have to speak. I have to sit. I can’t exercise. I can’t wash clothes so the stinch will get out of them.
So many things I
can’t do. It’s only the first month and I now understand how this is going to
be a really hard year.
But as I was writing
these things in my journal, complaining to God about all of this, I realized
something.
Everything I was so
tired of and annoyed with are all worth it.
This sacrifice of
minimal living and not being in control of my day is worth it. I am not in
control of my life anyway.
Being away from home
and in India is so worth it.
Sharing the gospel
and praying with the people in India is so worth it.
The only way I can
get through today is by Jesus alone. His Joy is going to be my strength,
always.
I am going to choose
a positive attitude. I am going to choose to love the people more than myself. I
am going to choose to love being surrounded by my team because we need each
other to get through this.
I choose Jesus. I
choose God. I choose the Holy Spirit.
I choose sacrifice. I
choose to die to myself daily.
But I am not doing
this for show or for myself. I am doing this because it’s what Jesus did for
me. It’s what Jesus did for us. It’s the only way to live.
