The Lord didn’t lay anything on my heart that night to grieve, so I
just stood and sang softly. I thought about going to pray for people because I
love doing that. I know the Lord really speaks through me in my prayers, but I didn’t
want to go pray.
I was nervous because I didn’t know how to pray for someone
who was grieving. Then, a friend from Adventures came up to me and said,
“Aubree, I think you have some joy and peace to give away. You need to go and
pray for people.” Well, there was my answer. I asked him, “How do I know who to
pray for.” And he responded, “Ask the Lord. Look for people who look like they
need prayer.” And I did.
I knew I didn’t need to know what to say, I just had to go
up to someone and say yes to God. I saw one girl sitting by herself, head down,
tears in her eyes. I was lead to her. I prayed. I don’t remember what I said
and I don’t know if what I said was what she needed to hear, I didn’t know who
the girl was. I went to the front of the room and prayed for a squad mate.
Again, I don’t know what I said or if I said anything she needed to hear. I was
standing in the front of the room asking what to do next, where to go next.
A girl who I hadn’t had a conversation with on my squad was
standing next to me. She leaned over and asked if she could tell me something,
she asked me to sit down.
She then began to open her heart to me, someone she
hadn’t spoken with but said a simple “hello” to. And as she began to tell her
story, my heart sunk and I began to cry.
She began by saying that she had never had a boyfriend
before. Now, I have had boyfriends, but I do have friends who haven’t, so I
know what it’s like in a way.
Because she hadn’t had a boyfriend, she never felt beautiful or
worth anything. This is when I started crying.
Women believe these lies of the
enemy. We believe that because we don’t have a boy’s attention we aren’t worth
loving. I know I have believed them, it hurts.
She goes on to explain that she
does ballet and that is what makes her feel beautiful. And now that she is
going on The Race, she no longer has that to make her feel worth anything.
God
took over my mouth, my thoughts, and my spirit. This girl was so broken, I
couldn’t help but pour my heart into this prayer.
This is why I was in the
front of the room, to hear her burden. I don’t remember what I prayed, but I do
remember saying “boys are dumb.” Not that that is the reason she feels the way
she does. The reason she does is because like us all, we believe the lies of the enemy.
We have to rebuke them, call them out of our mind and scream, “NO!” Don’t you dare believe that you’re not good enough, you’re not smart enough, you’re not old enough or you’re too old, or that you’re not pretty enough. We are enough for a God to send his one and only son to come to Earth and die a horrible death on a cross just to show how much he loves us. When we rebuke those lies, we have to remember this truth.
“You’re worth it, in every way.” These words were spoken over me the second night of training camp. Thank you Jesus.
