First I want to apologize for my lack of updates recently! Just wanted to let you all know that everything is going ok.
But this feeling of just being ok, I'm so over it. I have been feeling just ok for months now. I have been stagnant in every aspect of my life. No spiritual growth but no spiritual falling either. Just here.
At least when I was struggling, I was growing in the process. I had to learn new things, dig deeper, pray harder. I hated it at the time but I am glad that I went through it. Hindsite is 20/20 as they say.
In order to grow, there must be pain. The famous workout slogan 'no pain, no gain' holds true here as well. No pain in our spiritual life and there is no gain.
I have run from the pain, the hardwork that comes with growth. In order to make good grades you have to work hard and make sacrifices, in order to get in shape you're going to be sore. In order to grow spiritually, you must be wrecked.
Isn't there just a microwavable version of this spiritual growth? I've grown up in this generation where things are easy, there is always a microwavable version. Self-help books that promise a new you by the end of it, diet pills that claim to be the cure all, online essays that you can buy.
But they never work out. That short self-help book didn't really fix things, those diet pills caused severe stomach problems, and those online essays get you kicked out of school when you're caught. Even microwavable meals aren't ever as good as the real thing.
We are a generation of laziness, I know I am. I know that I want the easy fix without the work. I am realizing that it doesn't work though.
So I am going out on a limb here, a limb that I might regret, but bring on the work, bring on the pain, bring on the wreckage. This stagnant life isn't working anymore. The easy way isn't working for me. It's leading me to a life of discontent and unhappiness. And I'm not ok with just being ok anymore.
