It’s been nearly seven weeks since I’ve been back in America (and yes, my title is a “This is Us” reference). I’m sorry for not blogging until now, but here is an update about everything that has been going on!
Over the last seven weeks:
-I settled back into life in America, and got to see our cat, Sneaky Paws.
-My sister, Allison, and my new brother-in-law, Alex, got married.
-We celebrated Christmas and New Year.
-I went to Project Searchlight in Atlanta, Georgia.
Life at Home:
The first week home was really stressful. It involved bachelorette party planning, visa preparations (for Korea), dress alterations, Christmas shopping, and a handful of other things. Within three days, my dad asked me, “Don’t you wish you were carrying a backpack right now, camping, no showers, trekking in northern Spain?” And I kind of laughed and said, “Uhh, kinda.” (Although any witness can tell you, I did not, in fact, carry my 65L backpack on the Camino, we didn’t camp, and we had showers. But still.) Anyway, things have settled down, and for the first time in the last several weeks, I feel like I’ve had a half-second to breathe. I’ve started painting a lot and would love to show you my “creations.” My style can best be described as “abstract art.”
Allison and Alex’s Wedding:
Allison looked SO beautiful at her wedding and things went very smoothly, even my maid-of-honor speech which I was super nervous to give. Now I have a new brother and I’m patiently waiting for the day I get to become an aunt! (That is not an announcement by the way, just a future hope. They are not pregnant, don’t message them, they’ll be very confused.)
Christmas and New Year:
Christmas was great. Allison and Alex stayed with us and my Grandma Mumsey was in town. New Year’s Eve was really slow but it was good to have some time to reflect on the year.
Project Searchlight:
Project Searchlight (PSL) is a post-Race conference that takes place about a month after we get home. It’s about a week long, and all food and meals are covered by our fundraising, so it is essentially free to go. You even get a small travel stipend. So, I was excited to go, but generally just called it “the World Race re-union” when I didn’t feel like explaining it to other people. In my mind, that’s primarily what it was: an opportunity to see my squad again. But, at the risk of sounding totally cliché, it was so much more. First of all, I experienced reverse-reverse culture shock, returning to a group of people who believed the same thing as me. To be honest, I had found it very hard to keep up with spiritual disciplines while I was home, and spent the month feeling a bit distant from God, for a variety of reasons. However, at PSL we had worship twice a day and I felt like I was able to actually connect, instead of letting my mind wander or feeling disengaged. Every day we had sessions and I was able to walk away with a lesson or encouragement from each one. In the evenings we had mini-debriefs with our squad. We were placed into groups of four squad-mates and a mentor to have more in-depth discussions. The cool thing about my group was that it was all people from my second team, Team Two, including our alumni teammate Elva! (Ari, we missed you! And Heidi was in another group…maybe they decided to have mercy on me after three teams with her :P). It was so amazing to be able to share with people who knew my story and could speak into my family life, love life, and faith life with love and understanding, without judgement. Lastly, we had “prophetic rooms” that you could sign up for. I know that might sound weird to some of you, but basically it was people doing listening prayer for you and telling you any words or visions from God they got on your behalf. One of the visions that meant the most to me was one of a reversible picture (like the picture of an old lady that turns into a princess when you flip her upside-down). Anyway, someone got a picture of me holding up a mountain, but when you flipped the picture over, I was actually doing a handstand on the mountain. He gave me this picture along with the verse, “Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you,” (1 Peter 5:7). The point was that I felt a sense of responsibility for a lot of things and I was carrying the weight of them around. But I can trust God, and cast my cares on Him. During worship, there were several instances when someone would go up to share something like this as well, about people who are carrying burdens that are not theirs to carry, and holding onto control and responsibility of things that are in Gods’ hands alone. It was very freeing to be able to confide in one another, cry with one another, and pray for one another. And to think I went into PSL claiming, “I didn’t need healing!”
All that to say, PSL was wonderful and I am really grateful for all of the people who put it together. G- Squad, I love all of you so much. PSL was bittersweet cause in a way it felt like a more long-term goodbye than in December. But I hope to see you all again this side of heaven. Please, for real, come visit me in Korea!
I’m not sure if this will be my last blog… I’ll leave it open, but just in case, goodbye, I love you, and thank you, to all of my supporters, subscribers, friends, and random readers from the World Race blog page!
Lots of love! Have a happy 2019!
