One of the things that my third grade teacher said about me, that I have never forgotten, is “If Ashley wants to do something, she will put effort into it and do it. If she does not, she will not really try.”
The World Race (WR) is something I really want to do. So despite some seemingly enormous barriers, I am going to do my best to do what I have to do. But in this blog, I just want to talk about some of my biggest concerns and hesitations and ask you to pray for them for me.
The first and most immediate concern is this: The WR route I chose is (to quote Adventures in Missions (AIM/ADV) “intentionally challenging and physically demanding, traveling vast distances over land and sea.”
To be honest, any of the routes would have probably been physically demanding for me, but it still freaks me out that this one is supposed to be even more intense.
Now I somehow I need to go from this:
to this:
by October.
Anyone who knows me well can attest to the fact that I am the last person who should probably be attempting something like this. I once had an old lady hand me her walking stick when I was hiking. True story. And like, old old. 80+. There were witnesses. But, just as I am trusting God to help me raise the money, I am trusting Him to help me prepare for the physical side of this trip as well. He is the one who made my body. He knows what it can and cannot do. Let Him work a miracle.
The first time I picked up a 30 pound pack I thought, “What am I doing?”
When I was exercising and found myself Googling how to avoid/soothe leg cramps (and subsequently what an electrolyte was), I asked, “Who am I?”
The most jarring of all was about two weeks ago, when, for the first time in my 26 years of life, I ordered decaf coffee. At a cafe. Like, I paid money for something that I previously regarded as so useless that I looked down on its very existence. But, because coffee may not always be available first thing in the morning and regularly throughout the day, my addiction must take a backseat and I have to cut back.
This blog is already getting long, and I haven’t even mentioned my fear of insects. Fear of having to eat something onion-infested. Fear of peeing on the side of the road or in the woods. I’ve read a lot of blogs in the six years of dreaming about this, and many of them have made me question, “Who am I? What am I doing? Can I handle this?”
The simple answer is no, and that has been what I’ve been learning in this journey before the journey. I cannot hold tightly onto any aspect of my personality: out of shape. coffee addict. onion hater. indoor person. Jesus has called me to be the person He wants me to be. I have to be willing to grow, develop, and change. He will strengthen me, yes, even if a cockroach crawls in my tent, I have to believe He will give me courage (or at least a courageous teammate to exterminate it for me.) If I am tired, I have to believe He will give me energy and refresh me through the Holy Spirit, not just through coffee. That is how I am being called to grow in my faith during this period. To stop questioning who I am and if I am capable. But to ask who He is, seeking Him and seeing that He is capable. So, please pray for me. Pray that I can give up coffee. Pray that I don’t get seriously sick on the Race. Pray that bugs and insects largely leave me alone. And please pray for my faith in Him to grow in this process. Thank you for reading and for praying and please let me know how I can pray for you too.
Lastly, for those of you who did not understand the movie reference, that is from Big Hero 6 and you must go watch it right now!!!
