When this all first started and the thought of fundraising was even brought up, I was so game for it. I said to myself and even others, "Watch..I'll raise $15,500 before I even leave in January." Here's a little update: I leave in two months and I need $13,500. Ummmm?!?! What the heck happened to this all ginormous and epic plan I had?
I fiddle faddled around for WAY too long because I was terrified out of my wits to finally commiting and look where that put me. I could seriously hit myself in the head for putting myself into this situation and then I found out that big businesses won't donate due to the religion aspect of it. Let me tell you how that put a huge ol' damper in my crate of good ideas. Support letters, asking friends for money, asking family for money, all of that..I hate it. I've never hated anything more in my life along with the most awkward moments ever that are included in it. I loathe sounding cliche and needy..along with feeling like I'm begging. With everything that started happening on my list of things to get done; vaccinations, travelers insurance, camping equipment, and doctor meetings to figure out how I'm going to achieve getting blood work done in the middle of Africa, I basically deviated from where this all began. I deviated from having that moment back before I was even accepted..from that moment on May 31st. I need to dig by heels back into this and remember what the heck I'm doing.
I had some amazing conversations with my sister and with Jacob and it gave me a new direction of all this. I realize that fundraising sucks and that NO ONE enjoys it. But this is it and this is where testing yourself begins. The mission trip doesn't start when you leave in January-it starts WAY before that and fundraising (in my opinion) is a HUGE part of it. This actually is testing your faith, will you find yourself in a way more deeper and rad relationship with God due to actually putting your faith IN HIM or will you give up? I like to think that this next week will prove some miracles for me..I need to get over this first fence.
