Walking the bar infested streets of Thailand is disturbing. Lust smells like stale air, cigarette smoke, alcohol, cheap perfume and insense. Lingering in the air, it’s aroma is thick and intoxicates the people who dwell in it. Lust for pleasure, money, empowerment, an escape. It’s destruction is evident in the faces and attention seeking actions of scantily clad young women, lady boys and men with wide eyes who’s hungry gaze devours the sights, sounds and smells around them slightly appeasing their fleshly desires. But fleshly desires only create more of an unquenchable emptiness that by earthly means can never be satisfied.
Emptiness cries out but is smothered with fake smiles, laughter and a quick fix. Identities are lost, burried or stolen. Worth is defined and determined by sex appeal and performance. Love is just a fancy word for pleasure, the real thing is just a myth. Self respect and consideration for others only existed hundreds of years ago.
Emotions bombared my mind almost as fast as images are burned into it. Anger, frustration, sorrow. As we walked the streets, praying and taking everything in I fought anger towards the men who give these girls business. My flesh wants to find someone to blame. And yes many of the girls choose to be there but for some reason it seems so much worse that these men are the ones keeping them there. Only did my anger come to a simmer when I saw a man who was sitting with a Thai woman staring off into the distance with an empty, lonely look in his eyes. Satan likes to distract me, us, by getting to be angry at the people involved rather than the one who caused all of this screwed up mess, him.
It’s ridiculous to me that prostitution is just another job here, it’s acceptable. My heart is breaking for these people who are caught up in this empty, vicious cycle. Feelings of hopelessness creep in when I see how many people are tangled in this trap. How can I make a difference when I don’t even know what to say? How can I make all of these girls understand their worth and identity and the great love of our father who has a better way for them? How can I make these men understand that what they’re doing is wrong and does not make them anymore of a man? How can I tell these lady boys that God made them perfect just the way they were but He loves them anyway no matter what they look like? THIS IS NOT THE ANSWER TO THEIR EMPTINESS, THEIR HURT, OR THEIR FEELINGS OF WORTHLESSNESS. I want to yell at the top of my lungs on the street to all the people who pass by like nothing going on that this is not okay.
.
Everytime I try and fix this on my own I will fail. Nothing I can do will change these people, this situation, the society. Only by the Lords power will people find themselves, see their worth and feel complete. He wants my help but it’s a quite relieving to be reminded that it is in my Daddy’s hands and He’s taking care of it. His heart is breaking into a thousand more pieces than mine because He loves all of these people with a perfect, unconditional love.
For about 3 hours last night we wandered the streets praying and talking to girls and lady boys. The first girl we talked to was absolutely beautiful. Her name, Bell, was very fitting. She went inside the bar with us and we talked for about an hour about her life. At 23 years old she is married with a 2 year old daughter. She lies to her parents and husband telling them she works at an office. At one time she did work at an office but the quick money and the burning need to provide for herself without any help drove her to working at the bars despite how much she dislikes it. In fact money is the reason that most of the girls work at the bars.Once or twice a year Bell makes her way back to her home town where her family lives so she can visit for a month or so and then comes back to Pattaya to work. Thankfully she was very open to hearing about the Lord so we shared the gospel with her and prayed for her. Cierra, one of my friends on the squad brought the book Redeeming Love by Francine Rivers to give one of the girls but ended up going home so she passed it on to Anmari to deliver. Anmari had to go home as well so the book got past on to me and I had the honor of giving it to Bell. Please pray that she will be able to understand it.
Me, Bell, Tracy, Andrea, the “mom” of the bar and Jiap
Many people were very open to talking to us, hearing us share about Jesus and even praying for them. After we had prayed over the street we ended up going to see the new Narnia movie, which I highly recommend to everyone. It is incredible. I left feeling encouraged and uplifted rather than discouraged and hopeless.( I almost forgot I was in Asia when I walked out of the theatre haha!) Anyways one line stuck out to me that I want to share with you that perfectly sums up our evening and my heart.
“I can’t give up that which my very father died for.”
We can’t give up that which our very father died for.
No matter what.
Please don’t give up on the people of this world that our very own father died for! They need Jesus and they need you to tell them about Him.
