I love hospice. I know it’s hard to muster up the words to say that on most days, but at the end of the day, I really do love it. I have an incredibly unique opportunity to get to hear stories from people who have lived a whole lot longer than me and have the stories to prove it.
Today I traveled to a patients house today to give them an anniversary gift, for what is most likely going to be their last anniversary while the patient was still alive. (An aside–How do you pick out a proper anniversary card for someone when you know that this will be their last? Most cards wish people many more years of happiness, which is just not appropriate in this situation. I was in tears before leaving Kroger and we finally settled on one with a Bible verse as the focus.) I was riding with my friend Christine, who is awesome, and we were talking about marriage and what it looks like and how special that bond is. We talked about the true idea of marriage being that you can serve the Lord better with your spouse than you can by yourself. But we were only talking. A true picture of marriage was, at this point of our day, only verbal for us.
Today was Mr. and Mrs. J’s wedding annivsersary. They have been married for 59 years. And although Mrs. J is unresponsive to any contact, Mr. J is still as in love with her as ever. We sat for an hour listening to Mr. J tell us about how he and his wife loved people, about the vacations they took with friends, about their intense generosity, and about the incredible love they shared with their family. He talked about his favorite book in the Bible being Daniel, and how he used to read the Bible once a year, but that didn’t end up being enough, so he started to see how many times he could read through it each year. Mr. J is a man of faith, a man of God, and a man who’s pores are oozing out the love of Jesus.
I asked him, “Mr. J, what does it take to have a happy marriage for 59 years?”
He replied: “Faith in the Lord. That’s the only thing that we ever clung to.”
*Marriage Boom*
The conversation that Christine and I had in the car on the way to this house was a precursor to the actual picture of marriage that we got to glimpse into today. A picture of how Christ loves the church. A fierce loyalty from a husband who loves his wife to the core, even though she is slowly dying. A pure and gentle view of vulnerability combined with strength and boldness that comes from Christ alone.
As we were leaving the J’s house, Mr. J stopped us outside and prayed a blessing over us.
Each day in hospice, some hard and dark, and some filled with beauty, is a chance to learn.
There can be so much life and hope in the name of Jesus, even when bodies are being consumed by physical death.
May the gigantic love of Christ and His desire to pursue you simply overwhelm you.
-sisk
