So, I have attempted at packing the backpack, practiced pitching my new tent, went over my training packing list about a thousand times, so I think that I am now throughally terrified and ready to go!
I have always been the type of person who used the phrase: “Your own backyard is your Mission Field! You don’t have to go to Africa to minister and change people’s lives! Those people are already around you!” Now, don’t get me wrong. That is a great phrase. And it served me well for years. I had many oppotunities to serve my friends, community and church in my own backyard without leaving the comforts of my own home.
Many of you may already know, but I hve been feeing a huge amount of discontent over this past year. I had felt the call into ministry when I was just a sophomore in high school! I always knew that God has a specia plan or me, and even if I was never sure of it, I knew He would take care of me. Because, He was the only one through all of my ups and downs, who was always….ALWAYS…. there for me. At first, I thought I was supposed to become an ordained elder in the United Methodist Church and Pastor a church of my very own. Then later, I thought felt like I was supposed to be a Youth Pastor. Then later after an AMAZING week of VBS, I felt like mybe I was supposed to be a Children’s Minister. Then, I felt like maybe I was supposed to be a College Chaplain. Or even a Prison Chaplain! All I knew was, what I was doing…was not what God wanted me to do. Although I was not sure what I was supposed to be doing, and I still do not, I was always faithful that God will provide and keep His child safe and taken care of. He has always stayed true to his promises to me, no matter how much I yelled at him for crummy times, or how lost I felt at times. It was then tht I discovered that my comfort zone was not protecting me, but hurting me and distancing me from God. If I wanted to truly wanted to find myself and find myself in God, I was going to have to drastically change my life.
Well, that idea absolutely scared me. So, for better or for worse, God changed it for me. Now I realize that trough all the pain that I went through this past year was all bringing me toward this. All bringing Him glory through a difficult situation. I may of never even heard of this opportunity if I hadn’t had those certain experiences to bring me here. And for that, how could I not be grateful?
I know now that God has called me into this world of international missions not because he thinks I know everything about it or am totally prepared for it, but because God will get me through it. Even though I will greatly miss my hair products, blackberry, friends and family…I know that God will provide and I will be blessed immesnely by following His will, FINALLY, for my life.
I am not a huge camper. I like to think of myself as one, but I m not. However, I am learning and willing to give this a shot. I over pack for everything, well, now, I won’t get the opportunity to do that! I take a lot of things for granted. No longr will that be an issue. I am truly giving EVERYTHING up to God. I am truly leaving EVERYTHING behind to take up my cross, and follow Christ. It is scary, I cannot say that enough, however I am now seeing that it is everything. It is all that I ahve. Why wouldn’t I trust and obey?
PLEASE Pray for me this week! I leave for training camp tonight and do not return til the first! I will tryto blog in the meantime, but this will be an eye opening experience, I know. And one that I will need lots of prayer for. My little world is getting ready to be rocked. :]
