Are you really ready?
‘Cause I’m not usually this vulnerable, especially not to a vague online audience… definitely not vulnerable enough to have this information searchable on Google…
But here we go.
It’s 10:30 PM and tomorrow is a big day for me. You see, I’ve been working on something for 5 and a half months.
5 and 1/2 MONTHS.
Every week I get a little closer to the goal… sometimes I’ve even gotten further away. Those were tough weeks. Still, I’ve kept an eye on where I am and how far away from the goal I stand.
On occasion, when the goal seemed to be getting further away instead of closer… and I knew it… I had to make a decision. I had to decide if I was going to measure my progress and own the results of my efforts. There was a temptation to look at the goal and think, “I could avoid measuring my progress this week and just work harder on the project next week to make up for it. That way, it’s like I never lost ground.”
Sounds more motivating huh? You’d think it would be more motivating to set a goal and always progress to it… even if that progress was uneven or sporadically measured.
Call me crazy, but I thought I might try something different. What if I faced the issues that stood in way every week when I took an honest account of my hard work and efforts?
What if those things that ultimately brought me to a dead stop before… those things that had been absolutely un-motivating and down-right discouraging… what if I looked them in the eye?
What if I saw the small steps backwards, in the midst of many leaps forward, and said, “So what?” … and then kept going.
For the past 5 and a half months, there have been a few weeks when I’ve had to ask, “So what? Okay, is it still worth it?”
Ha.
It’s one thing to watch it unfold in a tear-jerker, stand up off the couch and pump your fist in the air, kind of movie. It’s another kind of difficult when you’ve got to climb up on the scale, or look in the mirror, or try on that pair of jeans you’ve only ever hoped you could fit into.
You see, I’ve been trying to shed some pounds these past 5 and a half months. Late last summer I had someone lovingly tell me that things needed to change. The things I wanted in life and the places I wanted to go weren’t things that were guaranteed to someone who didn’t take control and responsibility for their own health. As hard as that was to hear, there are tons of prayers of thanksgiving going out for that courageous and loving person.
Every week I go to a Weight Watchers meeting and check my progress. I have several mini-goals set up along my road to achieving a healthy weight and lifestyle. The first big goal is to lose 10% of the weight I started with on the program.
Just 10%.
Think about it with me… 10% in 5 and 1/2 months. Progress has been slow. It’s at least slow to somebody who watches those crazy people on the Biggest Loser drop 50 or 60 pounds in a month. (I know… it’s different…. but still, you can’t help but want that to be your life!)
Don’t get me wrong, I’m proud of myself. I think the slower progress has been good for me. It’s proof that my mindsets and attitudes and habits are changing forever. I feel assured it’s not me just preforming and striving to meet some standard… it’s really about fixing what’s broken. (That’s my official shout-out to Bob Harper.)
So what?
I had some bad weeks were I lost sight of the goal… I got caught up in the process or learning how to manage travel schedules, eating at a training camp, surviving the endless buffet’s on a cruise ship, making wise choices at big holiday meals, and by-passing the convenience of a drive-through. Fail forward. The scale takes no prisoners and won’t hesitate to say, “that was one stop at the Biscuit Shoppe to many Ashley!”
On those days I learned a very valuable lesson. It doesn’t take courage to set a goal, or even embark on a journey to reach a goal… Courage comes when you recognize you’re failure to attain a goal, and you say, “So what?” and keep going.
It would have been easier to give-in. The weight-loss bar-graph has a few peaks on it’s downward slope. Tomorrow is hopefully the day I reach the first goal of many… But if something screwy happens and I don’t quite make it… so what? I’ll keep going. One step at a time, even if they are small.
Have you hit any roadblocks in your attempts to reach a goal? We are two months into the new year and nailing down all those lofty new year’s resolutions. Will you be courageous enough to measure your progress even if you don’t think you’ve taken much ground? Will you be bold enough to stare it in the eye and say, “So what?”… and then keep going?
