I don’t go camping on the weekends, dissect spiders for kicks or climb mountains in my spare time. And, yet, I find myself on the World Race—an organization that blooms under adventure.
In the past ten days, I’ve moved to Ireland, converted my money to Euros, and spent every night in a sleeping bag.
I can’t say that it’s been a bad thing. I’ve managed to eat mint chocolate chip ice cream and actually do laundry (which is an unexpected gift). I’ve taken four showers so far and have been able to brush my teeth twice a day. My dentist would be proud.
But, it’s not that I’m sad about the spontaneity that’s flooded my life. It’s that I can’t seem to get filled up here.
If you’ve ever eaten a ton of starchy and carby foods in your life (white breads, potatoes, and rice), you may have noticed that the food doesn’t actually fill you up. The food initially fills, but after a while, the hunger inevitably returns.
That’s how Ireland has been for me spiritually. I am fed by sermons I hear, from daily reading of the Word and through ministry. Yet, somehow, I walk away from each day, depleted and hungry for something other than what I am experiencing.
I noticed this same trend while I lived in the States, but it seemed to be at such a quieter level. I would go to church, Bible studies and do ministry. And, yet, I knew that things were off. I wasn’t quite filled.
Last night, I took the opportunity to hang back from our weekly Bible study and I spent time with Jesus over two tortillas and a cup of hot tea. In those precious moments, I came to understand a few things about being filled.
I will never be able to find complete satisfaction with any thing—be it food, fun times, or conversations. No joy, laughter or friendship can create within me a sense of deep peace.
The only way I can come to a place of satisfaction—of being truly and completely filled—is through the love and grace of Jesus.
Ireland is not what I thought it would be. But, I guess that’s the nature of choosing to work with an organization like the World Race. We may not get the chance to have frequent showers or be able to consume tons of fruits and vegetables. But, we have the choice of who to be filled by.
Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.
Matthew 4:4
