Cliffs.
7 months earlier on the Race in month 2, I stood on an edge of a cliff in a rock quarry in Ukraine. I had the opportunity to jump off the edge and into the deep water like all of my teammates had been doing. But, I didn’t choose to jump off the edge in Ukraine. I climbed down the cliff instead. Honestly, I just didn’t want to jump. I didn’t feel like it.
And, yet, on day 16 of month 9 in Thailand, I climbed up to a similar edge like I had in Ukraine, on a similar looking cliff in a similar rock quarry. And, as I looked down to the water below, I realized that I actually wanted to jump.
It seemed odd. I wanted to jump. Off a cliff.
So, 35 feet later, I hit the water. I had jumped. And, I liked it.
As I went to bed that night I realized that Jesus had been asking me to jump off cliffs for a long time. He had been asking me to risk everything He was for Kingdom. But I had always been climbing down the cliffs instead of jumping off of them.
He wanted me to risk the fall. I had risked little.
He wanted me to risk my inheritance. I thought it better to risk nothing.
Jesus had been calling me into risk for a long time. But, He wasn’t just hinting at trusting Him more. He was asking me to risk every gifting and every blessing He had ever given me. He was asking me to risk my ideas. And my dreams. And my frame of reference.
He wanted me to be risky with my time. With my grace. With my friendships.
I had been climbing down rocks for most of my life. And, I finally heard Him. I wanted to jump. And risk Him.
A Back Story.
Jesus offered me some incredible encounters with people in Thailand. One of the encounters was hearing the story of a missionary I lived with. Her story included an outrageously divine dream the Father had placed on her shoulders. But, as she told her story and shared her dreams, she made mention of how her purpose, for a time, was to serve another person’s dream for Kingdom. Jesus had asked her to wait on the dream He had placed within her.
Buds.
As I walked back home one night, I walked past a tree freshly budding with flowers. Casually, I grabbed one of the buds off of a flower and continued heading home. A few steps later, Jesus asked me to turn around and go back to the tree I had pulled the bud from.
As I stared at the flowers and the branches, I heard Him speak.
There are times when Jesus has asked me to follow someone else's dream. When I follow, I become this little green bud on someone else's flower, on someone else's branch that's on someone else's tree. During those times in my life, I’m not serving my own dream. I must rely completely on what Jesus has for me on that tree because I am intrinsically connected to the choices, the life, and the growth of the person whose dream I am following.
But, as I continue to be obedient to growing in the service to someone else's dream, I begin blossoming into a flower…growing into a small branch…strengthening into a strong limb…growing into a tree…budding other flowers…flowering other trees…seeding other dreams.
For most of the Race, I heard Jesus asking me to follow someone else’s dream when I arrived back on US soil. And, for most of the Race, I had refused to give into His request. Following someone else’s dream isn’t glamorous. It’s not always fulfilling. And, it’s not what I wanted to do.
It’s risky.
I could head onto law school. I could use my degree.
But, I could follow someone else’s dream. I could risk my future and my time. I could risk the word of Jesus.
As I’ve learned, jumping is best. So, I’ve chosen to live in risk. Come September, I’ll be living somewhere else, doing something else, following someone else.
Thailand was a time of risky moves, risky ideas and risky love. It wasn’t what I envisioned. But, it was far more than I could have concocted on my own.
Because that’s how risk works. It’s more than I can dream up on my own.
