The past week has felt more like a month , we’ve adjusted to being in South Africa with our ministry host John who has very quickly become family . We’ve also started to become more familiar with public speaking but It hasn’t always been this way.
January 15th was our first time speaking to high school students, we performed a skit about identity and shared our testimonies .
Honestly I was so nervous! that whole morning I felt bogged down and was isolating myself because I couldn’t deal with the stress I was feeling . I am NOT a public speaker . If I could have had a super power that day it would have been invisibility !
In high school I would ask for 30% less in class so that I didn’t have to present papers to the class. The anxiety that comes with this is almost overwhelming .
Finally It was my turn to share , I paused often to try and formulate sentences that would make sense. And honestly I didn’t say much my brain felt like jello, but I survived and learnt a lot.
Fast forward to this past Friday and the difference is incredible , I’m not freaking out in the class any longer, I’m actually able to have a conversation with the class ,we’ve been playing interacting games and being real with them about our lives. I stopped trying to “perform ” and started being real . And the difference is incredible . I’ve actually started asking for parts in our sessions , which last week I was practically hiding trying not to speak .
At one point this week I felt like I hadn’t grown enough ,I felt like I should be way further than I am , I mean I should be a professional public speaker by now right ?
I was missing the fact that in the past week there have been many victories such as :
Getting comfortable in front of large crowds
Facing huge fears
Praying for classrooms of kids who wanted to accept Christ
Learning how to be a family and not just a team
Initiating praying for people when doing door to door ministry
Praying for people and watching them get healed
Pushing myself in the prophetic , thus pushing the team as well
And so much more .
Honestly I can’t even explain how much this past week has changed me . I’m no longer terrified to speak to classrooms of kids instead I’m at ease because it’s up to God to speak through me. Realizing it’s not all on me and not all on my performance has changed everything about what we are doing .
I never would have imagined myself enjoying speaking to teenagers about their worth and identity , but now I can’t imagine not being a part of the amazing things new season foundation is doing in the community .
I’m so grateful for this opportunity to serve here.
We leave in a week and a half for debrief in Durban than to Botswana we go .
I’m not ready to say goodbye to this place yet !
Please continue to pray for financial provision , I’m still In need $2200 to be able to stay on the race.
Also pray for my ministry hosts daughter mishael, she is participating in YWAM here in South Africa and is not yet funded for her trip .We know God can do it , please lift her up in prayer:)
Also please pray for my team that we would continue to grow closer and get to know each other better
And for ministry , that we would allow God to speak through us and impact the children in ways only God can do.
Thankyou everyone who has helped me get here , honestly I can’t thank you enough . I can imagine not being here with my team and doing the great things we get to do .
