Since starting on this journey, I have had that scripture welling up in my heart that speaks of the one coming up out of the wilderness leaning on her beloved. And I have been thinking on how the Lord leads us into one hundred percent dependence on Him when we say yes.
Because there are parts of God we never see until we say yes.
Earlier this week, I had had a dream where someone prophesied over me and said, that God was delivering me from a spirit of performance. And I found those words resting on me, working their way into the insides of my heart.
For years, I had been a performance and approval addict, conjuring up my value by what people thought, by the look on their faces when they saw me and saw what I had built. But like a shallow well, it was a constant ache and cry, that constantly went dry. And through many seasons, Jesus has been working it out of me, exposing the lie and offering me the truth.
And the past few days, I have felt something just rising up in me, that I want intimidation to break. That all this timidity would just get off of me and that the power, love, and sound mind that He promised me would be mine. As if He is going in deep and pulling out all the roots, all the residue,
And saying, "I am your Romance."
Because isn't it true that once it is just commands, we lose the romance? Once we get just caught up in only what He tells us to do or not do, we lose the wonder. We lose the romance of what we once had with Him. But yet, when we open up our hearts, when we say yes to you no matter what it looks like, when we live with a heart wide open…..man that's an invitation. It is an invitation to jump into a future that is unlimited, endless, impossible made…possible.
We get to live in love.
The Lord looks to stir our hearts. He'll pull out our heart, call out a hunger and stir up a response. I feel like Holy Spirit loves to just stick His hand in our hearts and bring some movement. Like how people reached out and touched Jesus robe not because someone commanded them to, but because something stirred in their hearts. And how the angels cry out "holy, holy, holy" not because of a command but because of a stirring.
That moment when something leaps out of us, says yes and grabs ahold of God.
If we always wait for someone to tell us what we do, we will wait an entire lifetime. He wants to be discovered out of romance. He calls us to a romantic adventure. He calls us to a dance. And yes, He gives us commands but we follow His commands out of the overflow of the stirring of our hearts, not out of the dry wells of "we have to."
For He is the greatest adventure.
Discovering Him is life's greatest adventure. Knowing Him, finding Him, falling deeper and deeper and deeper in love….that's true adventure. Not knowing what He will say or do next, finding the parts of Him I have been afraid to know, that's adventure. Getting so close to Him, climbing upon His heart, hearing Him breathe, hearing Him roar…that's what takes our breath away.
In Luke 5, it talks about how the power of the Lord was present to heal. I love that because I think that tells us that when God shows up, we can ask Him what He wants to do and that when He shows up, He is not always wanting to do the same thing every single time.
That if we live out of principle, we will get stuck in what we think He wants to do or what we think He wants us to do, but if we live out of His presence, we get captivated by that song and beating in His heart.
If we live out of His presence, we just fall in love and we'll do whatever He dreams about.
Just because we love Him. Just because we know Him. Just because we can't get enough.
