"Why are you wasting your life?"
This question changed my entire life instantly.
It was three years ago, I was walking back to my dorm late at night, and ran into my dear friend Mohon. We stopped and began chatting. I asked about his summer and did the general catch up thing that every college student goes through. His answer revolved a lot around the Lord and I was cool with that, but I couldn't have cared less. When he asked me, "How was your summer? How has the Lord been working in your life lately?," I laughed in his face.
He hadn't.
For the months or longer before this conversation was taking place I had totally ignored the Lord.
I had no interest in hearing Him, learning from/about Him, or worshipping Him.
My life was empty.
Numb.
As I was explaining this to Mohon I said things like "no, I know, it sounds bad…." and "yeah, I will get back into it eventually, it just doesn't really feel like it means anything anymore," and "I mean, I have been a Christian for a long time. Everyone goes through dry spells, right? I will be fine. No worries."
I thought that was a sufficient enough answer.
I wanted the conversation to be over.
Mohon looks me straight in the face with sincerity, authority, and a little bit of anger:
"Why are you WASTING your life?"
I was stunned.
What do you mean wasting it?! I am FINE! I am happy. I am in control! You don't know anything about me! How dare you criticize my life or my faith? I will get back to the Lord eventually, I always do…
and then, it hit me.
I WAS WASTING MY LIFE.
I went back to my dorm that night broken, mad, hurt, and most of all… AWARE.
I began writing in my journal for the first time in months. At 2:56 AM on August 30th, I wrote "… I hope that soon I will be able to come to you with arms high and heart abandoned but for now, my heart remains guarded. I am working on it. Amen."
And that was it. That night forever changed my life and set my life on a path of beauty, brokenness, and surrender. So I ask you, my dutiful readers…
Why are you WASTING your life?
I am not asking in a preachy way at all and neither was he that night. I am asking because at some point it must become real to you that it is NOT your life in the first place. We were created to bring Him glory. That's it. "Whatever you do whether in word or deed, do so unto the Lord." That is it people. The mark upon which all of our decisions, words, thoughts and actions must be set against.
That night led me to where I am now. It led me to The World Race.
A lot of people have asked me to write a blog explaining what the World Race is, for you folks, here it is.
The World Race is a global mission trip. The baseline of it is that I will be backpacking (tent, backpack, sleeping bag and all) around 11 countries over 11 months. It is through an organization out of Georgia (not the SBC or the NAMB.) called Adventures in Missions and it promises to be exactly that- an adventure. I will train with a squad of about 60-70 and then I will have a team of about 6-8 that will be with me at all times. Boys and girls alike (the horror!)
The total cost (all inclusive, basically) will be around 15,500 dollars. Yes, as in fifteen thousand and five hundred one dollar bills. Quite the undertaking. Totally worth it.
Now comes the confusing part…
When I first knew that I wanted to do this, I was ready to go immediately, signed up for the soonest route I was able to and just went for it.
no.
OK, so, I then signed up for this upcoming July, just picked a route, went with it. I was ready to go!!
no.
OOOh, so you want me to go later?? ahhh gotcha? well, January sounds nice. That is a year away. More time…got it!
NO.
I must be clear: I am still going on this trip. That I do know. The fuzzy part has become the question of "when?"
For now, I am a "floater" in the AIM system. I have no route picked (next July's come out later this year) and I know that makes some people weary of sending in donations. However, if you want to give PLEASE PLEASE do. 15 grand isn't exactly chump change and I am DEFINITELY still raising money. The beauty of not being "committed" to a route while still being committed to The Race is that I have the unbelievably blessed opportunity to raise this money basically stress free. SO, GO FOR IT!! There is a little link under my picture that will guide you to give me all of your life savings whatever you can.
In all seriousness, I know this blog was choppy, poorly written, and packed with content (some random, some helpful). I wanted you all to see this side of missions though. It isn't always cookie cutter trips that allow you to go in and out of a country for a week knowing exactly when you will be going, where you will be sent, and how it is all going to happen. I am learning that as the Lord molds this plan for me that I have the unbelievable opportunity to literally depend on Him for every single tiny little answer within it.
So, dear friends, loved ones, and complete strangers, join me in this journey.
Pray.
Love.
Donate.
Feel free to ask me questions and most of all… STOP wasting your life.
