A couple months ago, I took a test to discover my “love languages.” My results weren’t all that surprising. (Just an FYI, love languages refer to how we receive or give love.) According to the test, I accept love the strongest via a) Quality Time, b) Physical Touch, and c) Receiving Gifts.
Acts of Service and Words of Affirmation were the lowest on my list. I’m just a LITTLE BIT independent. And, clearly, words alone don’t do it for me. Love, for me, requires an investment. Sacrifice some time, give of yourself and put forth some serious effort; then we can talk.
So it’s not all that shocking that when I recognized the expectation to give and receive love from perfect strangers over this 11 month adventure, I was a bit of a skeptic. My strongest friendships have developed over the course of several YEARS – some even since I was around age one – but none of them have less than six years in the books. These folks have seen me at my highest and lowest; they know exactly what it takes to surpass my breaking point, and they are the best option for bring me back to “normal” when needed. I would without hesitation do the same in return, but let’s be honest, even the strength of the love I have for them is “conditional.” It’s been a process. It took a whole lot of hand holding, giving of time and self, and demonstrations of commitment. Call me selfish if you want… it’s just how I’m wired.
The World Race will stretch your wiring. For one, EVERY month, you’re dropped into new surroundings, new cultures, new living situations, and NEW relationships. No matter what ministry project you’re assigned, the bottom line expectation of any Racer is this: LOVE people. But how? I get less than 30 days to somehow form a bond that is greater than skin deep, to sincerely pierce hearts, and to essentially fall in love. That’s insane.
Somehow, though, it happens. God has provided conversations, hugs, prayers, tears, naps, handshakes, games, smiles and at least a million waves that have stimulated a love greater than anything I could possibly explain in words. There are children I’ve seen almost every day while here in the Dominican Republic that my heart nearly breaks to leave behind. There is a man, who’s name I don’t even know, that God allowed me to lead to Salvation, and his face is one I will never be able to get out of my head. Raul, Zanza, Samuel and Rebecca, the family that I’ve lived with for less than a month, have truly become MY family, and I will miss them dearly! Is this really what it’s going to be like month after month – falling so deeply in love with the people I work and live with that it physically hurts to leave? There is nothing “normal” about this – it can only be explained as the Supernatural Love of God.
But there’s more…
It’s one thing to be expected to demonstrate Christ’s love throughout the nations, and as a result wind up loving perfect strangers. It’s supernatural, for sure, but sometimes it honestly feels easier to love people that you don’t know (or that don’t “really” know you.) What I truly find to be The World Race’s claim to fame, however, is this whole concept of Community.
Throw together six random women, assign a couple leadership roles, tell them to go bond (Pizza and Ice cream, FTW!) and anticipate that before long they will fall in love with one another. Wait… what? (Okay, so it wasn’t exactly like that. A whole lot of prayerful consideration goes into the formation of EVERY World Race team, and that has proven so incredibly true over the past month.)
I marveled to a couple of my teammates yesterday about the INCREDIBLE diversity on Team Dunamisses. I relate, a little bit, to everyone. Liz and I have sports in common; I connect the most with Laura on our belief system; Karen and I share a love for sarcasm; Monica and I rock the Southern girl lifestyle, and Becky and I both sing, A LOT. Beyond those things, though, there are a million differences. A million reasons why in “the real world,” some of us would probably NEVER even consider being friends. A million reasons why this “family” that we have been forced to form should crumble.
And yet, I wake up almost every night and check to make sure that each of them are safe in their beds. When we are apart, even for a few hours, I miss them terribly. When they hurt, I feel it! When it's their time to shine, all I want to do is hold them high above my head. It’s my heart’s desire to insure that they are each protected, happy and continually growing into the woman God has designed them to be. With sincerity, I can not remember my life before knowing these women, and I don’t even want to consider the rest of my life without any of them. Bottom line… I LOVE them.
I seriously can't imagine life without these ladies. (Back row, LtoR: Ash, Liz, Karen. Front row, LtoR: Becky, Laura, Monica.)
Quality time? Unless you count working together CONSTANTLY, then no, there hasn’t been a ton. Physical touch? Well, we ARE in close quarters, and we HAVE all piled in one bed, but we were sweaty and gross and stinking and it wasn’t exactly pleasant. Receiving gifts? Umm… we’re on The World Race budget. Nuff said.
I think sometimes God laughs at “love languages.” He made us, afterall, so He is well aware of how we are programmed to give and receive love. But He is also, clearly, capable of engraining a LOVE that makes no sense. A LOVE that defies logic. A LOVE that really shouldn’t exist. A LOVE that is SUPERNATURAL! After all, that is the LOVE He has for us.
It is my prayer that God will grant Supernatural LOVE in your heart for the wonderful people He has placed in your life!
Be Blessed,
Ashlee
