We are trained to hate “bad guys.” Even in our earliest days of Disney and Nickelodeon (or in my case, PBS) it becomes our accepted societal norm that at the end of every story or show, the hero always wins. The underdog always triumphs. The Average Joe always excels. The hurt are healed, justice prevails and our hearts are warmed. We expect “just desserts,” that villains will get what’s coming to them and that in the end they will wind up hurt. Period.
But, what about redemption?
What if Jafar had ultimately turned things around, proven himself truly apologetic, asserted himself as loyal to the Sultan, befriended Aladdin and become a hero in his own right? Could we have forgiven him? He was an outright jerk, after all. He was controlling and greed driven, and then there were the multiple times he tried to kill people… It doesn’t seem just for him to be pardoned of any of those things, no matter what good he commits post, right?
It seems a silly comparison to reality, but when you really think about it, we pretty much feel the same way about our fellow man, especially when they mess up “big time.” Somewhere along the pattern of life, it becomes engrained in us that forgiveness isn’t acceptable. Maybe we think that it weakens us? Maybe we are not really ever taught how to forgive? Or maybe we harbor such bitterness and hatred toward the person who wronged or hurt us that we simply can’t bring ourselves to want anything good or beneficial for them?
During our month of ministry working in Sex Trafficking prevention, I realized how incredibly difficult it was for me to forgive the “Pimps” (sellers) and “Johns” (buyers) of the innocent children we were fighting to protect. Thoughts of those people disgusted me, moved me to desire physical harm for them and left me with no loving attitude toward them, whatsoever. Whatever punishment dealt to them, they deserved. Eye for an eye; that’s what the Bible says, right? They caused panic in so many; shouldn’t they receive just an inkling of the same?
But then, what about the people closer to me… those who, although inadvertently, are somewhat responsible for the panic attacks I deal with? Don’t misunderstand. I don’t blame anyone. My parents had no way of predicting that I would respond to their divorce in this way. Friends who have let me down probably never even knew the effect of that one, simple action. It’s no one’s fault, but I still DO experience panic, so shouldn’t someone pay? It’s a little different when you’re dealing with people you care about. I’ve gone back and forth with this conundrum for months.
God… where does redemption lie? How do I find it? I have no grace for these faceless people who harm innocent children. I feel an obligation to extend grace to people I love deeply. How do I do this?
And in very profound form – cause God doesn’t really speak in any other form – He has shown me that they are deserving of the same grace He constantly extends to me. They, too, are His children. He died for them, too. And by harboring unforgiveness or wishing ill thoughts on anyone, I’m actually sinning against a creation that God loves, despite any mistake or wrongdoing they may be guilty of.
Sometimes… I eat crow.
Fortunately, at least for my psyche, I’m not the only one. One of the most famous Biblical characters had trouble accepting that God’s grace extended to his enemies. When God called Jonah to go to Nineveh, Jonah ran in the complete opposite direction. The people of Nineveh had oppressed Jonah’s tribe for years, warring against each other, making slaves out of his people. He had no desire to help them turn their wicked ways around. If you know the story of Jonah, you know that his actions landed him in the stomach of a whale, praying to God to wind up vomited (GROSS!!!) onto dry land. Wouldn’t you know, after all that, he wound up in Nineveh? He did as God asked, preaching against the Ninevites corruption and spurring them to believe God, and specifically to believe that He would punish them severely if they didn’t shape up.
What’s cool? Jonah was successful. The Ninevites turned to God; God had compassion on them and didn’t bring destruction like He had threatened.
What’s not so cool? Jonah was pissed! He couldn’t understand why God would show such grace and compassion for a nation that had done such outlandish things. He went so far as to say he would rather be dead than observe this graciousness.
God, I’m not that bad, am I?
To teach Jonah a lesson, God allowed him to retreat to a place east of Nineveh to pout, and there God provided a vine to shade the prophet. The following day, however, God provided a worm that consumed the vine entirely, allowing the scorching wind and blazing sun to torture Jonah, again causing him to profess his desire to die. God calmly pointed out, “You did nothing to help the vine live.”
Essentially, the vine could not have saved itself. Neither could the Ninevites. Neither can Pimps or Johns. Neither can those who hurt us unknowingly. Neither can you or I.
Forgiveness. Compassion. Grace. Mercy. This is how we find true redemption. And through redemption, we can truly overcome panic, once and for all.
Be Blessed,
Ashlee
