Hello and welcome to my thoughts from the past 48 hours.
Surprise! I don’t like writing. I don’t think I’m good at it. I’m also not so great at vulnerability for the whole world to see.
So I’m sure you can understand the amount of internal conflict I have going on every time I try to come up with my latest post.
I was talking to a friend the other day and asked him for suggestions for the topic of my next blog post.
He responded with (paraphrased): prayer and how it impacts you/your heart + the importance of being in the world, but not of it.
These are great suggestions. And as I began trying to think of my experiences with those topics, and how I could formulate them into blog posts, I found myself wondering why THOSE were the topics he came up with.
Then it dawned on me – because he knows a lot about them.
From there I began thinking about what an encouragement he has been to me throughout the years we’ve been friends. I think of the times he’s told me he will pray for me, and the peace I would get in that moment, knowing that he really would. And I think of times he’s sent an encouraging word to build me up or said something ridiculous to lift my spirits.
And then I got to thinking about the other people in my life.
I have a hand full of close friends. They’re my people. And I am so thankful for them.
I think of sweet moments sipping coffee with a dear friend, tears streaming down our faces because we each understand that the other gets it.
I think of nights that could have been spent mindlessly watching Netflix, but were instead spent sitting cozy by the fire, talking about life and struggles and praying for each other.
I think of the people who know my weaknesses and flaws, and instead of defining me by them, they speak freedom from them over me.
I’ve learned over the past year or so, that I’m actually really introverted. People wear me the heck out. I’ve had many thoughts of moving to a deserted island and being a hermit for the rest of my life. But then I think of how lonely that would be.
Jesus chilled with the homies, so I should too. (That rules out the deserted island.)
He also knew that He needed time to withdraw and spend time alone with his Dad, so I should too.
I’ve realized how crucial relationships are.
I’ve also realized, more importantly, how crucial my pursuit of Jesus is.
My heart is that others would see Christ in me, but if I’m not filling myself with Jesus, then He is probably not going to be what pours out through me.
The people that the Lord has placed in my life push me towards a more intentional pursuit of Him. Why? Because I see Him all over them and I want more of what He is doing in their lives and in my life through them. My soul is encouraged to see them relentlessly seeking after God, even in the toughest times.
So, Jesus, thanks for speaking to my heart and using people to break through my thick walls and show me more of You.
I pray that I would be as big of a blessing to each of you, as you are to me.
