Nobody’s more surprised than I am that I will be taking a year off of school and traveling around the world, missionizing. This was not what I had planned. I was planning on transferring to a four year college, graduating on schedule and when I had saved enough money, starting to travel. Many people questioned my timing, saying “shouldn’t you just finish school first?” or “how are you going to get the money?”. These thoughts entered my mind, and for a while I decided I agreed and I thought “Yeah, it doesn’t really make much sense to go now, I’ll wait”. Turns out, it doesn’t really matter what I want.
For as long as I can remember, I’ve always struggled with the idea of being “sent by God” or being “told by God”. I always liked the way it sounded, and deep down, I knew God had plans for me, but how did I know when God was telling me to do something? Is it a gut feeling? Is it a sign? Do you hear some thunderous voice in the middle of the night? Was there something wrong with me that I had less of a relationship with Him than my peers? When I first heard of this trip, I was REALLY REALLY interested if this was some sort of sign by God that I should take a leap of faith and do something crazy like this. The night I discovered the World Race while on the internet, I stayed up until about 3 in the morning filling out the application. But then I realized it was crazy of me to just sign up for something like this without even like, talking to my parents. When I brought it up to my parents they were like “…..that’s neat”, and picking up on their less-than-excited tone, I was brought back to earth, and I remembered that I don’t do stuff like that.
But of course for the next month I was completely restless. The idea of going off to college sounded less and less satisfying, I couldn’t stop watching World Race Youtube videos, and I was becoming less and less satisfied with my everyday life here in America. The World Race was becoming the only option that felt right. If I did the World Race, would I be ready? Did I have the capacity to impact people in the World? Was I brave enough to be out of my comfort zone for 9 months and rely on faith? In church and in bible studies, I kept hearing verses like “drop your nets and follow me” and “He must become more and I must become less”. And really, how can I call myself a follower of Christ, if when confronted with a challenging lesson that clearly relates to me, I respond with an excuse as weak as “That’s not something I’m comfortable with” or “I’m scared”. I was starting to realize that this was how God was telling me to go; He was changing me from the inside out, leaving me with no other option and He was reassuring me through his word. I knew then that I had to go, and when I was afraid I would be reminded of verses like Joshua 1:9, “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go”.
That’s a promise. “Your God will be with you wherever you go”. He will be with me when I am fundraising. He will be with me when I am tired and sick and I want to go home. He will be with me when I am confronted with the corruption and heartbreak that fills this world. And how do I say no to a promise like that?
Everything I’ve read on past and present racers’ blogs speaks to where I am in life. A recurring theme of some blog posts is that this trip will be hard, in some moments, the hardest thing you’ve done, but it will be so, so worth it. During this trip we will help those in need, we will hear stories that break our hearts and give us hope, we will laugh and make lifetime friendships, we will live minimally, we will see the world, we will be in the world, we will change completely, and we will see others change. Most importantly, we will learn how to trust in God completely and share Him with those who do not know Him. I can truly say, that I am so overwhelmed by the good that can come from this trip, that the idea of not going on this trip frightens me more than the idea of going.
