I seriously cannot believe the second month of the race is almost over. I catch myself talking about the next nine months…but the race is no longer nine months! How wild! Seven-ish months left!? The days seem like an eternity, but looking back at the weeks and months, they’ve flown by.
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Part of this past week I was sick and stayed home for a couple of days. It was nothing too serious, a fever and diarrhea, but I know that the healthcare here in Cambodia is far different than that of the states, so I chose to take care of myself. Where I would’ve typically pushed through and went on about my day at home, I decided resting would be the best thing for me to do here. So I did.
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The first day was hard, I felt more homesick than usual and I talked to my leader, she prayed with me, and asked me what my mom does specifically when I get sick. I thought about how to answer this question the rest of that morning. Mom makes me a palette on the couch with quilts and the brown blanket. She puts a washcloth on my forehead and turns the tv on or gets me a book. And she rubs my back and massages my face. She comes in the living room every .5 seconds and tells me to drink, drink, drink. That morning I asked God what a healthy amount of finding comfort in Mom looked like. Family in general. I have no earthly idea where I would be without them, but also I know that my main source of comfort shouldn’t be found in them, but in God. My family is a gift, and I need to surrender them to God. He has showed me the balance of honoring them and also abandoning them. God thanks so much for family.
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The second day a reoccuring theme kept appearing, and I knew each time, God was just reminding me ever so gently. Joy. October 22nd, this was the entry in Jesus Calling..”No matter what your circumstances may be, you can find Joy in My Presence. On some days Joy is generously strewn along your life-path, glistening in the sunlight. On days like that, being content is as simple as breathing the next breath or taking the next step. Other days are overcast and gloomy; you feel the strain of the journey, which seems endless. Dull gray rocks greet your graze and cause your feet to ache. Yet Joy is stail attainable. Search for it as for hidden treasure. Begin by remembering that I have created this day; it is not a chance occurrence. Recall that I am present with you whether you sense My Presence or not. Then, start talking with Me about whatever is on your mind. Rejoice in the fact that I understand you perfectly, and I know exactly what you are experiencing. As you continue communicating with Me, your mood will gradually lighten. Awareness of My marvelous Companionship can infuse Joy into the grayest day.” Our squad devotions were about contentment, and one of my teammates prayed over me later that day for contentment and joy. How cool?! Thanks God for speaking in so many different ways.
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Isn’t it crazy to think that God knows us better than we know ourselves? Some people on my squad have been planning what they’re doing after the race, some have even been applying to colleges. But in these three days of rest, God reminded me that He’s got it under control. He knows the ideas running around in my head of what I think may happen after the race. But ultimately my ideas aren’t even a fraction of what He has for me. I wonder though. I wonder what next year will look like or what five years from now will look like. I told Him my ideas, as if He didn’t already know them.
Be an orphanage mom.
Learn sign language.
Trek Everest base camp.
Work at a flower shop.
Own a coffee shop with Mom.
Go skydiving and paragliding.
Be a yoga instructor.
Learn how to quilt.
Go to a lantern festival.
Go to surf school in Hawaii.
Have a small cottage with a green house in the back.
Get married.
Have and adopt kids.
Be an artist.
I’m thankful that He wants me to continue to tell Him about my day, the little things that happened, about how I’m feeling, about my desires. And to keep on wondering. About anything and everything.
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I never thought I would say this, but I’m so thankful I got sick. I’m thankful that God altered my perspective and reminded me to be joyful in all circumstances.
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He’s so good. All the time.
