“Most of these women are single mothers, abandoned by their husband.” Pastor shook his head sadly. We were standing in the back looking in on a congregation that was mainly comprised of women with children tied to their backs and clinging to their skirts.
“Commitment is not a priority for Malawian men, and when times get hard many leave their wives and children for an easier life.”
Throughout this month I’ve witnessed the extensive impact of the Pastor’s comment. As we walk throughout the town, it is astonishing how many women ask us to pray that their husbands will return and that they will be able to find food for their hungry children. Story after story of heartbroken, desperate single mothers testify to the widespread issue of divorce.
What drives the knife even deeper is that Africa is a man’s continent. Similar to a hundred years ago in America, women are undervalued and have little to no voice here. They are expected to stay at home, care for their children, and cook for their men. When visitors come, the wives work all afternoon to prepare a feast, carefully set a table, and then eat separately in the kitchen. Although we, as American women, are as respected as men because of our white skin, it bothers me to watch it happen. As do the occasional comments that even kind, God-fearing men make that imply that women are not as intelligent, capable, or valuable as men. It is clearly a culture that caters to men. As a result job opportunities for women are rare.
The issue however is not just rooted in the men but the women as well. Many believe the lie that they are helpless without a man’s provision and they have nothing to offer outside of the home. Thus when mothers are abandoned, they don’t know where to turn and are left in poverty, scrounging for scraps to keep their children from starving.
As we discussed the issue with the Pastor, he asked if we had suggestions on how to empower Malawian women.
We decided to conduct a business seminar accompanied with jewelry making classes.
None of us are business majors, but simply by being educated, ambitious Western women who have been taught from a young age that we can do anything we set out to do, we had some encouragement for these women.
The main message was that each of them are capable. Whether it is making jewelry, sewing, opening a shop, growing something unique, or cutting hair, there is something that each of them can do that others will be willing to pay for. The possibilities of what each of them have to offer are endless.
It’s baffling how such a simple, ingrained notion for some can be so novel to someone else.
We gave them basic economic teachings and keys to a successful business, and then taught them how to make wrapped-rock jewelry. Making wrapped jewelry is one of Jessica’s side hobbies that she sells for a small fortune at art shows. One day, when we were sitting outside the house, she noticed that the ground was teeming with rose quartz and other precious rocks that she uses for her craft. Along with several pairs of pliers and rolls of wire that we purchased for the women in town, we had all the supplies necessary to conduct a jewelry making trade school.
Art is powerful,
and creating it is even more so.
Using your hands to produce something beautiful is extremely therapeutic.
It is liberating, soothing, comforting, empowering and restorative.
For a time all the sorrows and burdens that weigh on your shoulders are left behind as you escape to a world where there are no rules or right and wrong,
a world of colors, sparkles, twirls, twists, and complete freedom.
In it, you remember that there is beauty and endless possibilities hidden inside of you.
It wasn’t long before the bamboo hut was filled with laughter and easy conversation. The women excitedly tied their pendants around their necks and wrists and held up their creations for their teachers to admire. For hours they sat on bamboo mats as torrents of rain pounded outside, forgetting the harsh world as their fingers diligently constructed tiny masterpieces.
The women left different that day. It is hard to articulate exactly why, but there was a fresh radiance in their smiles, a calmness in their demeanor, and a new confidence in their step. They walked away with a little more hope and self-worth than when they entered.
Often, we aren’t even aware of the lies that we’re believing. They have been spoken into us since we were children, integrated into our own self-image and reiterated by our culture. Sometimes it takes getting out of your house, trying something new, surrounding yourself with fresh perspectives and people who believe in you, or even traveling the world in order to awake the possibilities that lay sleeping within.
