This week we are at our family vacation in Florida. Sunshine and surf is plentiful. The water has been gorgeous and clear and the first three days have been wonderful. I’ve spent time reflecting a lot on myself and my identity. I recently spoke with a trusted mentor about figuring out more about who I am and who I want to be. There are behaviors I’ve picked up that I don’t particularly want to keep my whole life and other ones I want to refine and be the ones that people think of when they see me.
I love being in the ocean. I love the water. I have always been one who would be in the pool or the ocean as long as possible – I just feel at home engulfed in the weightlessness and fluid motion. Body surfing and snorkeling are two of my favorite things to do in the ocean. This week has provided lots of opportunities for those.
As I was floating along at one point, I found myself thinking about how we are to be salt and light. The saltiness of the ocean is part of what provides its healing power. Jesus also says to the woman at the well whoever comes to him will not thirst for he will raise up a spring of living water. These two phrases from Jesus came to mind as I was floating in the water. The ocean is certainly full of life and life giving. It provides healing. I had several cuts and scratches that have now faded in the healing of the salt water. I think too I had some deeper soul healing this week or at least some realizations as I let the ocean of God’s grace and mercy wash over me.
I am on a journey. A journey to be completely healed of past bitterness, anger, frustration, lies I’ve believed – about myself and others and God. I am on a race. I was recently reminded by a teammates blog that this is about training and preparing. If I show up to camp or even to our launch having spent all this time preparing physically with gear and raising funds, but have had no time preparing my heart and mind for the adventure ahead, I will be severely disappointed to find out that becoming the woman God created me to be isn’t an instantaneous thing. I must put in the work to train myself. This mean I need to start having quiet times again on a consistent basis. I need to be praying daily for my team, myself, my funds, the countries we will visit and the people who we will come to know and love. I hope that I can let the healing of Jesus cover me completely so I go into the race full of grace and whole in Him. I must be his salt to give others a taste of his goodness and grace, and he must quench my thirsty heart with his ocean sized love.
