Luke (10:38) tells the story of two sisters; Martha who greets Jesus and then becomes distracted by her “many tasks” and her sister Mary who “sits at the Lord’s feet.” This week I have been feeling particularly like a Martha. I often struggle with anxiety, and when I become anxious I become a busy body. I focus on all the things that need to be done and then become insistent on getting as many of them taken care of as quickly as possible. I use busyness to block out my concern and my anxiety. As I was lying in bed one night, running through all of the tasks still left on my list, I had the realization that I had not spent any time at the Lord’s feet (so to speak). I was insistent on taking care of things on my own and it wasn’t going very well. I was worried about fundraising, concerned about not knowing enough about gear to buy the right things at an affordable (hopefully) price, stressed that I wouldn’t know the right things to say in my fundraising letter, and fretful that I was going to forget something important in my preparation for the race. It even occurred to me to be jealous of the World Racers who I’d watched in a video earlier that day because they had a time of devotional to spend with God every morning. The ironic thing is that there is nothing keeping me from the same joy; or at least nothing but my excuses about having to wake up earlier, or put aside other things, or (probably the biggest hurdle for me) not getting so busy that I put it off until it’s put off for tomorrow. I took a step back and turned things over to God. Now I’m not one of those Christians that thinks we can do nothing while expecting God to take care of everything, but I do think that there is a lot to be said for consciously resting and trusting in Him. So for the rest of the week I’ve been making an effort to hand over my stress and anxiety and trust in Him.
The rest of the week has been filled with comforts for each stress I was experiencing. I was worried about money, and a part time job came through. While it won’t let me pay for the World Race, it will help me to save more towards it, which eased some of my stress. Looking at gear was causing me to feel overwhelmed, and a few old friends, and their significant others, have helped me to understand what I need and find it at prizes that are reasonable. Fellowship and encouragement from Roanoke friends helped me to write the letter in a way that felt genuine to me and how I feel about this journey. I also found an email with a list of everything that I need to do leading up to the race start date (I find lists very comforting and helpful to keep my scattered brain in check). Even a situation that should have been stressful ended up being a good conversation with a friend and instead of feeling concerned about new responsibilities I felt an appreciation for that friendship.
By the end of this week, I can only feel grateful for the love and support of my community and having a God that provides guidance and comfort, even when it’s comfort and release from our own distractions and failures.
The story in Luke ends with Martha’s complaint that her sister has left her to do all the work and Jesus’ answer to her. I have been Martha, quick to complain about my busyness and to judge others who are not doing enough but Jesus’ answer could have easily been said to me.
“Martha, Martha,” (or Annaka, Annaka) “you are worried and upset about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary, has made the right choice, and it will not be taken away from her.” – Luke 10:41-42
Join me in being grateful that we have a God that longs for us to spend time with Him and pray for me that my heart will be following after Mary’s throughout (and beyond) this journey. Thank you for your support!
