“Who does this?”
“What am I getting myself into?”
“Where the heck are we going?”
“When did I shower last?”
“Why can’t I feel anything?”
This week has been full. Full of questions, full of hugs, full of love, full of God.
“Is this real life?” I’ve heard from various squad mates.
“is it real?” are we REALLY spending a whole NIGHT in New York City, flying to South Africa, and riding a minimum of 16 hours on a bus to get to our ministry location?
Am I really not going to see my mom, my brother, my sister, my grandparents, my church-for eleven months?
Do I really get to share life with these incredible people? Do I actually get to set foot on blessed African soil in less than 24 hours? Do I really get to serve and minister to sweet souls who need it desperately? Is it finally happening??
Yes.
I GET TO DO THIS.
What a joy, what a blessing, what a privilege.
I don’t know if my heart went numb from shock or if it’s refusing to process, but I don’t feel a thing.
And how to describe what has happened in just the past FOUR DAYS (has it only been four days?) to you, my readers?
All I can give you is facts and moments.
I can tell you a group of us took the L train into Chicago to explore and sat down to order a pizza before deciding we didn’t have time.
I can tell you that I saw a giant 3-dimensional mirror shaped like a bean.
I can tell you that people have been speaking life into me all week and I feel like a different person already. A person who says things like “I really want to speak into that” and “I declare strength and healing over you in the name of Jesus.”
I can tell you about the girl who walked up to me the other night and gave me a word directly from God without knowing she was doing it.
I can tell you about the amazing testimony of our squad coordinator who had terminal cancer…and doesn’t anymore.
I can tell you that the presence of God fell DOWN on us in a session and I trash talked a demon…out loud. (gasp)
I can tell you about the night that the men on our squad bared their hearts and our soles and literally WASHED OUR FEET.
I can tell you that we traversed through New York City ALL night last night without a wink of sleep. I can tell you about the lights of Time Square and the sunrise from the Brooklyn Bridge.
I can tell you that right now, I am sitting in the middle of an airport trying to get something that closely resembles an internet connection so that I can cram one last blog in before we end up out in the middle of the African bush.
I can tell you that we are going to be traveling for one more day (at LEAST) before ending up in the middle of Zimbabwe to minister in ways that God only knows about.
I can tell you that, in the midst of not feeling anything, I feel peace about the nothing.
Who does this?
I do. I GET to.
What am I getting myself into?
Something dirty, and messy, and completely worth it.
Where the heck are we going?
It doesn’t matter. He goes before us and with us.
This is real life.
Thank you for sharing the journey with me.
